50 Shades of Drake 3 and 4

Torn: Chapter Fourteen

    "Growing up, I was pretty sheltered. My parents allowed me to have friends, or would take my friends and I to the mall. But no sleepovers. I can count how many co-ed parties I've had throughout my childhood on one hand."

    "They sound like they were very protective," Brian commented.

    Destiny smiled. "They were. Being here, I feel so far away from them. Sometimes it really hits me, that I'm in a completely different country than they are. And I feel even farther. I used to talk to them almost every day. When I was in college, I was always updating them on my life."

    Brian tilted his head to the side. "What happened?"

    I got involved with a man who's taking me to sex clubs, spanking my ass until it's black and blue, and having me sleep in cages, she thought. Plastering a smile on her face, she said, "So much has been going on. You know?"

    He nodded and tugged at the knot in his tie. "It's so fucking hot in here."

    "Destiny?" Aubrey's voice sounded through the speaker mounted in the top corner of the elevator.

    Without thinking, Destiny sprang up to her feet.

    The elevator swayed.

    She grabbed onto the handrail and looked up at the camera.

    "Sullivan Elevation is here," Aubrey informed her over the intercom. "They advised that you may hear some loud sounds in the elevator shaft, but you're currently caught between two floors. They're going to open the doors on the floor above you, and help pull each of you out."

    "Do they know what happened?" Brian piped up from where he was seated.

    "Not yet - they said they have to conduct an investigation. They're going to inspect the elevator car, check to see how stable it is."

    "Every time I move, it moves," Destiny told him. "It doesn't feel stable at all."

    "I think one of the cables snapped," Brian said.

    "I'll throw that possibility out there," Aubrey told him. "Are you both all right?"

    "Yeah, we're hanging in there," Destiny replied.

    "Literally," Brian added.

    "It won't be too much longer, so...just keep hanging in there for me," Aubrey instructed. "I have to go speak with Sullivan, but I'll be back as quickly as I can."

    Brian peered up at the camera. "I don't know why I continue to fool myself into thinking that I can compete with him. It's like...an endless cycle. I have this moment of clarity, like now, when I realize that I can't possibly compete with him. I see the way he looks at you, and the way you look at him, or hear the love in your voices when you talk to each other, and..." He drew his knees up to his chest and wrapped his arms around them. "Even in the off-chance you actually did choose me, we would never have what you and he have."

    Her heart went out to him. She kept her voice low as she asked, "What makes you so sure of that?"

    Brian shrugged. "Aubrey is...the embodiment of intensity. Power. Always in control, always. He has everything. To you, he is everything, even if you're temporarily confused. You and I both know how this ends. You don't end up with me. You end up with him. And I end up standing by the sidelines. Again. Alone."

    "So, you're saying that you want to back out?" she asked him.

    He leaned his head back on the elevator wall, and the emergency lights washed over his face so that it was clearly visible. "No, I'm not saying that. If I'm given a chance to fight for you, I feel like I owe it to myself, and to you, to take it. I'm just saying that I'm fully aware of how stories like this end. I'm not the dynamic male lead character in this story. I'm the good guy, the safe guy, who hopefully finds love next time, or somewhere down the line."

    She stared at him intently. "You really feel that inadequate, compared to him?"

    "Can you blame me?" Brian asked her, sounding vulnerable. "Especially considering that I've lost a woman to him before?"

    She pursed her lips shut.

    "I don't mean to be a drama king," he said, staring up at the ceiling. "Events like this, where you come close to dying...all of a sudden everything that matters to you becomes clear. All of a sudden everything becomes clear. Everything petty and superficial, just fades to the background. The house. The cars. The suits. All of that shit...I could lose it tomorrow, and be fine. But...love, and family, and happiness...that's all I truly want. And not with just anyone."

    "And you deserve everything you've ever wanted," she told him earnestly. She touched his arm. "No matter who I end up with, you should never feel inadequate in comparison to someone else. You are your own man. And you're amazing. I've seen how amazing you are first-hand. You're intelligent, successful, good-looking, funny, brave, caring, passionate...you're great at playing the guitar."

    He smiled wistfully. "And it still won't be enough."

    "Don't say that."

    "If you saw yourself and Aubrey through everyone else's eyes, you would know why I am saying it," he said.

    "If he and I are so perfect together, then why do I keep thinking about you?" she asked him.

    His eyes locked with hers.

    "If he and I are perfect together, then why am I fantasizing about you? Why are there moments when I miss you so much that it physically hurts?"

    Several moments passed before spoke. Then he said, "Because we were shut in a house for a significant period of time. It was a stressful and traumatizing time. Aubrey wasn't there and you missed him. We bonded and on another night, coincidentally, when your mortality was threatened, is when you hit on me. You don't love me. You just...got used to me, used to having me around." He paused. "Or so you rationalized to me once."

    "I was making excuses," she told him softly. "I was making excuses, because I didn't know how else to justify loving two people at the same time."

    He narrowed his eyes at her. "You don't love me, Destiny."

    "You're just trying to convince yourself of that because you think you know how this ends."

    "I don't think I know how this ends," he told her. "I know."

    "Okay, then...back out of the agreement, then," she taunted him. "Since you know how it's going to end."

    He laughed. "You're getting angry at me?"

    "I'm not angry," she claimed. "But I'm sitting here next to you, telling you that I love you, and you're not accepting it. You're not listening to what I'm telling you, and that's frustrating me. This situation is already frustrating enough as it is. For many reasons."

    He released a deep sigh.

    "This setup was never fair to you," she told him. "I know that. I'm aware of that, and I'm sorry. I'm sorry for my own role in you getting hurt before. The setup isn't even fair to you now. It's not fair for me or Aubrey to approach you with this crazy idea for me to date both of you. There is the potential for you to get hurt again. There is the potential for Aubrey to get hurt. Either way, someone is guaranteed to get hurt. I don't know how it's possible, but I love you and I love Aubrey." She paused and fidgeted with the hem of her skirt. "I know I can be self-involved sometimes, but this isn't some plea for attention, or some desire to keep you both all to myself. I want to just...be happy, with one man. I want both of you to be happy. Aubrey believes that by me dating both of you, I can determine once and for all who I should be with."

    "What he really believes is that he is the one you should be with," Brian said. "He just wants to prove it to you."

    "And do you know what I say to that?" she asked him.

    He stared at her blankly and gave the slightest shake of his head.

    "I say, if you think he's wrong, then prove it to me."