Dysphoria

Chapter Fifty Three

I hadn't seen Nate for a couple of hours since we left school, which was usual for him on a big game night. He liked to put his phone away and limits as many distractions as possible.

The night before any big game, Nate always has a terrible night sleep. His nerves and adrenaline were always pumping so he usually has to try to get an hour nap and then a quick work out to warm up right before he leaves the house. He said it "maintains his focus on the execution process" and I just looked at him like okaaaay whatever works for you babe. Weirdo.

But I respected his dedication and focus and didn't want to interrupt. I knew he could get so anxious from years of having Cal in his ear that he could barely eat more than a banana and a granola bar sitting in the car on the way to the field.

I had just gotten to the Jacob's house to see him off. He tried not to look completely pleased with himself when he saw me wearing his jersey over a pair of black denim shorts.

I felt like an idiot poser, but I knew he liked it.

We went inside, because he was in the middle of getting ready to leave.

"Babe, you're not going on a foreign holiday calm down." I joked at how nearly he was folding everything into his bag, I knew it helped him to feel in control of the situation.

"If you look good you play good." He said folding a pair of socks neatly on top of his shirt into his gear bag.

"Oh really? You've got that swag mentality?" I laughed at him, bending over to lift up his bag and pretending to almost topple over. "Jesus what did you fill this with? Concrete?! Almost broke my back!"

"Shut up." He laughed chucking T-shirt at me. "That can happen later."

"That's not funny."I threw him a look and he just innocently shrugged his shoulders like it was worth shooting his shot.

He glanced at the time, it was already 5:30 p.m. "Alright," he let out a tense sigh, "I gotta get going for the pregame walk through."

I nodded heading over to give him a big hug. Marsha and I weren't leaving for another hour because the game didn't start until 7 p.m.

"Stay focused, listen to the advice of your coaches and play physical alright?" Marsha said after coming downstairs to give her son a quick pep talk that I'm sure she had said many times before.

Nate turned to me, it was a little awkwardly for the both of us in front of his mother so I just kept it short and sweet. I leaned on my tippy toes and give him a tight squeeze around the neck whispering, "As long as you don't completely suck ass, I'll be proud of you."

He pulled back, with a toothy grin on his face, telling me "Jeeze thanks, don't set your expectations too high."

I stood at the door and waved as he loaded his gear into the truck and drove off before joining Marsha in her kitchen where she was packing some snacks and drinks into the cooler.

"Is Aaron coming too?" I asked hoping he wasn't.

"No, he's visiting his girlfriend at Cal Poly for the weekend. She's nice, I've only met her once."

I genuinely couldn't imagine anyone wanting to date Aaron but I wasn't going to say that to his mother.

"How's the baby?" She looked down at my tummy.

"Oh!" I smiled caught, by surprise. "She...or he is good I think. I only puked once this morning so that's a win."

She smiled at me with her teeth showing but I could sense there was more to come than just idle pleasantries.