Lockdown

D I E

**TRIGGER WARNING**

PARI POV 

Suicide. 

He wanted to suicide today and honestly, now I'm scared. Just thinking that if I hadn't followed him that day in anger... What would have happened? Would I have been angrily listening to songs while he cut his hand in the kitchen and only noticed at lunch? 

Also, my ex hadn't left. But that wasn't the worst part. Because he actually helped me pull the knife out of his hands and when we were done, I was just looking at him with the same worried and scared look that he had in his eyes as my boyfriend cried in my arms. 

Suicide... 
I have thought about suicide many times. Sometimes, when I couldn't deal with my mom's constant abuse, I'd think of giving up on my life. But the worst was when Prachi actually deleted my story. I too had had that incident once in my life where I ran to the kitchen, grabbed the knife, and almost sliced my hand off but I had my dad and brother to stop me. Even my mother had helped them actually and now that I think about it, I'm so very grateful that they did save me that day. Otherwise, how would I have ever met that insecure, aunty-like dashing CEO? 

And as we stayed in a hug, I couldn't help but close my eyes too and pull him closer to myself because if he had died that day... I don't know what I would have done. I was just so very scared at that moment... I mean, just a few moments ago, we were bickering normally and now, he almost killed himself. His blood was there on the floor and my ex was looking at the both of us with worry... I just. I didn't know what to do. I know that I made him lose the job that he worked on for years probably. Never knew that he was so passionate about his work till that day but now I knew... His work was his life and if not his entire life, it was still a big part of his life...

" Bro. Listen... I'm working on a code and it's been taking me forever. If you don't mind, help me... Don't... Do that again," I never knew if bringing my ex back into my life was a good idea or not but at that moment, at lunch, if anyone could actually speak and break that long silence, I was grateful for having him there. 
" No. I-"
" Please. We broke into Google's firewall drunk, together. It's not your idea but, it can mean something... And don't worry about investment or anything. My dad is ready to invest everything. I just need your help. We can be partners, you know?..." at least he was trying. But Sohit looked the most far away from even wanting to help or be any part of his idea. 
" Thanks, bro but... I can't do it," 

" Sohit..." he wasn't even eating his food that day. He looked so very dull. Unlike what I knew about him. He looked so depressed and sad... I just couldn't look at him like that. So, I decided to intervene. I didn't care if he did take up that offer that just came from my ex but, I cared about his mental health and that was the lowest I know that he has ever been. 
So, when he looked at me, I just knew that I had to say something encouraging to him. 
" I'm with you..." I rubbed his arms, " I know it's a bad time but I also know that it will pass. I promise. I know it. You're a brilliant man... It might seem empty but there is very much to your life. Sohit... Please. Don't do this to yourself. You're a brave man. You even left home to pursue your dreams..." 
" Those dreams are broken, Pari. I can't-"
" But you still have the patent of the codes and the algorithm... Right?" I didn't know what he was talking about but I knew that the moment he opened his mouth, Sohit was looking at him with shiny eyes. 
" Yeah, but they own the name and the-"
" Doesn't matter. You own the codes. Just withdraw the permit of Juggle to use the codes and then you wait and watch,"
" My company will fall down like that! It can't work without the codes and-"
" It's simple bro. Either your investor understands your importance and himself reappoints you as the CEO or, you can just start from scratch. I mean, you still have those codes. Just modify them a little and you will already have so many investors. And I bet you can invest in a new company on your own too. It's really not the end bro," Did any of you understand what he just said? Because I understood shit. Literal shit. 
" Wait..." but Sohit seemed convinced. What was happening there? Were they going to partner up now? 
" That could work... But I need my phone... Need to call Kartik and. Just shit. My phone is gone. How the hell am I-"
" I have his number," for some reason, having your boyfriend's friend's number was pretty weird and apparently very doubtful... I understood that when I saw the looks both the guys had on their faces so, I just opened my mouth once again to explain the situation 
" Like, we just followed each other because he wanted to see you cut the onions. That story on insta I put... And then we just talked about your embarrassing stories and just shared numbers. Like, friends. What are you getting so doubtful over?!" I opened my phone and pushed it towards him, just to let him read all the messages. And trust me, if he found even one message where he wasn't mentioned, I would change my name! 

" This what you been doing behind my back now?! Was it not enough that you embarrassed me that day!?" he screamed the moment he read the last message and I swear I wouldn't have shown it to him if it wasn't really necessary... 
" I mean... We only joke around! Besides! You need to call him about something! Call him! Don't read my messages!" 
" You and I are having a chat about these afterward," he told to me in a serious voice, like he was my father and I gulped in fear. But then again, I couldn't do anything but nod my head... I guess he was in a bad mood...