Lockdown

Fix

SOHIT POV

" Sohit! What the fuck is happening?! First that Mishra and now you quit?! How the hell can you quit?!" he shouted in my ears the moment the call went through and I sighed 
" I didn't have an option. See, if that Mishra is going make my life miserable for not marrying his daughter, I don't want to be a part of it at all! Besides. I have an idea,"
" Right. Idea?! At this point?!" To be honest, I never thought that Pari's ex could be any help to me but now, he was definitely more like a close buddy. He really helped me in my time of need. 
" Yes. Idea. I'm withdrawing the permit Juggle has to use all the codes,"
" WHAT?! The company will stop like this!" 
" I don't want to do it but I don't have an option! If I keep any straw connected with that old man now, he will harass the fuck out of me and the situation here is not that great! Pari is... Pregnant,"
" WHAT?!! WASN'T THAT JUST A LIE?!"
" No. I just. We didn't know about it back when she said it... But I can't risk it all now. It's either this or just risk her life..."
" You've worked your ass off for this company Sohit!" 
" You think I want to give up!?" I shouted at him. Was I going to have a fallout with my friends because of this now?...
" I don't have an option! Besides, I know that you are capable enough to write a new code to keep the company working-"
" For how long?! I can keep it working for a few months but without the core code, it'll just be a skeleton!" 
" I just need those few months, Kartik... I'm... I'll be working on something,"
" What?" 

" Pch!!!!" I just happened to remember that one incident that occurred that one day when I was sitting next to her and we were both working when he asked that question.
" What happened now?" 
" My grammar is so fucked up! Now I have to fix everything. I wish I had an app that could fix my grammar when I write stories... Yaar. Sohit. You're an IT guy na. Can't you make such an app for me? Exclusively? For your dear girlfriend? It'll be such a great help... Baby...!" 
" It'll take years to write such a code! Don't expect much from me. I already gave you that story right? Be satisfied in that much,"
" PCH PCH PCH!" 

Bad time. Probably wasn't even right to think about all that when I was thinking about suicide but, I just couldn't help but think back to that one conversation that I had with her... 

" Something," I knew what I wanted to do now...
" Pch. Sohit yaar! What about me?! Don't make me the scapegoat for the company's ruin!" 
" Do you have any other option? I already quit! You just have to trust me on this one. Keep Juggle going... Once I have this code done... I'll give you a job," 
" You are giving me a hard time on this! Why can't you just talk to Mishra and get this thing solved?!" 
" No!" I had self pride! " I want his money sinking yaar! You don't know all the things he said about... Pari. I just. I can't deal even looking at him again,"
" I'll just have to fucking trust you now? Right?!" 
" Yeah..." 
" FUCK YOU! I was planning on starting a family here but just. FUCK YOU! If I don't get a new job by the time Juggle fails na-"
" You will. I know it!" yeah. It was hard to get them on my sailing boat but at least Kartik and Mayank agreed to help me. Ved... I didn't talk to him. 

And by the time I was done talking and negotiating everything over her phone, her ex was gone too. I was still sitting at the table and she was also still sitting right next to me, looking at me. Was she waiting for me to give her phone back? I didn't know. But the moment I managed to convince everyone of whatever I was planning and kept her phone down, I felt her hand move towards me. 

As I sighed, I was so very sure that she would pick up her phone but instead, I felt her hand touch my hand and rub it. 
" You haven't eaten anything since morning... Should I feed you?" was she waiting there to ask me that?! I just couldn't believe it... She was such a snobby cartoonish woman... How could she be so understanding? 
" Sohit... I don't know what you were talking about or what is happening here... But something is happening. I don't know what... Just. Take care of yourself. Please. Don't... Try that again. I don't know what I'll do if you..." aren't with me... Her words did stop as she raised her head and looked at me with tears in her eyes. But I know what she meant.
God... I must've scared her fuck out of her...

Do you know how guilty I felt at that moment?! You can't even imagine. Because her fucking hands were in front of my mouth, holding out a piece of roti and sabzi and her eyes were begging me to eat it. The woman who should have been pampered... She was taking care of me, a grown adult. And she was the one who stopped me from doing something so very stupid... 

Just that look over her face made me really break down. So, even if I didn't really open my mouth and eat what she was feeding me, I did hold her hand and kept it back down, onto the table. 
" I'm sorry... I scared you. I shouldn't have done that," 
" It wasn't your fault. Negative things just clouded your judgment... I'm just happy that you are still with me. Sohit... You are very important. Please. Know that. I love you," at that moment I couldn't help but ask myself. What did I do to deserve her? Just what...?