All Is Fair In Love And War

Chapter 5

March 31, 1943

After nearly two weeks there, Douxie was starting to get concerned. Lily's health was declining quickly. Douxie knew she was sick, but... he hadn't known it was this bad. And Carter wasn't handling it well. It hurt Douxie to see him so distraught.

"Hey." Douxie gently grabbed Carter's arm, pulling him by his side as they walked down the street. "You okay?"

Carter pursed his lips, shoving his hands in his pockets as he watched his mom walk a few paces ahead of them. "No." He said quietly. "I um," he cleared his throat. "I got a call from her doctor this morning and..." he shook his head, blinking away tears. "I can't. I don't know what I'm going to do, Doux. My mom-" he took in a shaky breath.

Douxie subtly rubbed his arm to comfort him. "It's okay. I understand."

Carter shook his head. "Douxie." He stopped and looked at him, brows furrowed and tears brimming in his eyes. "She's the only family I have. And she's- she's going to die." He staggered back a little as if the realization just hit him. "She knows it... but she's acting like she's fine." He angrily wiped his tears away, breathing shakily, shaking his head again. "I'm sorry. I don't know why I'm telling you this."

"Because you trust me." Douxie said softly, wishing he could comfort him more. "And you know I'd do anything for you." He lowered his voice even more. "And because I love you. So please, please don't stop trusting me like this. I'm here for you, Sunshine. You know that."

Carter nodded, taking in a deep breath. "Thank you... I know." He smiled softly and Douxie felt his heart warm. "I love you too." He whispered.

"Come on," Douxie inclined his head towards where Lily was still walking ahead of them. "We better catch up before she gets lost."

Carter snorted, letting Douxie pull him along by his arm. "She doesn't have dementia, Douxie."

Not more than two weeks later, Lily Howard was bedridden. They weren't able to admit her into a hospital, and Douxie got the feeling she wouldn't want that anyway. Carter hadn't left her side in days. He just sat there, watching his mother wither away, ignoring Douxie's pleas for him to get some sleep. Lily didn't have much energy to argue with her son, but she tried to. It was never a long argument.

Carter was holding onto her frail hand, gently rubbing his thumb over her knuckles as Lily tried to get out a few last words. Douxie stood a few feet away, wondering to himself how this could have gotten so bad in just two weeks. He saw a tear trickle down Carter's cheek and he had to hold himself back from reaching forward to wipe it away.

"Carter." Lily said, voice weak and shaky. "Sweetheart, there's one last thing I need to tell you."

"Hey, hey," Carter gently reached forward, stroking her cheek with his thumb. "Mom, it's okay. Save your energy."

"No, no. Carter, my baby." She smiled at him, eyes watering with tears. She weakly reached a hand up to grab his wrist. "You asked me about your father. And I-" she let out a breath, pursing her lips. "I was selfish. I didn't want to tell you. Because-because I knew he'd want to..." she trailed off for a moment before looking back at him with a smile. "You're so brave, Carter. So strong. I know you'll be okay." Her eyes flit towards Douxie.

"Mom? What?" Poor Carter looked so confused, so heartbroken, so distraught. "What are you talking about? What about my dad?"

Lily ignored his question, eyes on Douxie. "Take care of him for me, okay? He's going to need you. You need to be there for him, Douxie. Okay? Protect him, please. Keep... keep my baby safe."

Douxie gave her a solemn nod, eyes filling with tears. They were nearing the end. He could tell. Her life was slipping away. "I promise."

Carter looked helplessly between them, squeezing his mother's hand just a little tighter. "Mom... mom please. Please don't-" he stopped as Lily placed a shaking hand on his cheek, wiping his tears away with her thumb.

Her smile was sad, and her eyes were dull. "I love you so much, Carter. And I'm so proud of you. Keep going, keep fighting. There's so much left for you to do."

Silence filled the room, thick and choking. Douxie could do nothing more than watch and wait.

"I-I promise." Carter choked out, squeezing her hand tighter. He pressed his lips against her knuckles, holding her hand, shaking with tears until he felt her go limp.

Douxie could hear her breath leave her. He knew Carter had heard it too. He watched the way Carter's head snapped up instantly, the way he stared at his mother's limp, cold body with shock.

"Mom?" Carter sobbed out, voice was barely over a whisper.

Douxie tentatively reached forward, putting a gentle hand on his shoulder. "Sunshine..." he gently placed his other hand against his other shoulder. "Darling-"

"Oh god... please..." Carter cried, hand covering his mouth. Douxie pulled him back as he tried to grab his mom's hand again. "Mom-"

"Carter, she's gone. She's gone, love." Douxie whispered, pressing his forehead to Carter's temple. "I'm sorry, Sunshine. I'm so, so sorry."

Douxie held him as he screamed and cried, pressing kisses to his temple, hugging him tighter when Carter turned and buried his face against his chest. He pulled Carter from the chair, away from the bed. Away from... his mother. Douxie kissed the top of his head, tears slipping down his face as Carter shook in his arms. He knew how much this hurt. And all Douxie could do was hold him.

"I've got you, Sunshine." He whispered. "It's alright. I'm here. I'll always be here for you, Carter."

Carter sobbed into his chest. The only family he had left was gone. He was alone now.

"Oh, darling." Douxie whispered, gently rubbing his back. "Carter, love, listen to me." He gently took Carter's face in his hands, wiping his tears away with his thumbs. "You're allowed to scream. You're allowed to cry." Carter's bloodshot eyes met his. "But whatever you do, do not give up."

Douxie held Carter all through the night and neither of them got much sleep. Carter cried into his chest for what seemed like hours, and when he'd spent all his tears, they just laid there and Douxie held him and Carter shook against him, tired and grieving but not able to sleep.

"Darling," Douxie said gently, unable to get his voice above a whisper. He faltered, unsure what he wanted to say. Finally, he sighed and pressed a soft kiss to the top of Carter's head. "I love you. I love you so much."

Carter pressed his face against Douxie's chest, hands gripping his shirt tightly. He didn't know what to say, he didn't even know if he had the energy to speak. He opened his mouth to try and say something, but all that came out was a sob and a fresh bout of tears started.

The wizard just held his love a little tighter, gently rubbing his back. He wished he could do something to make everything okay again, but not even magic could bring back the dead. All he could do for now was hold him and be there for him and just help him through the grieving process. That was all Douxie could really do. He needed to be there for Carter. And he would be until the day he died.

' The next morning when Douxie woke up, Carter was gone. At first he felt panicked, but he calmed down when he saw the door was ajar and the light in the room across the hall was on. He made his way to the room that was washed in grief and sorrow. The bed was pristinely made and every medical item cleaned out. You'd hardly know this was a room that had held a dead body just the night before. And sitting against the wall by the door was Carter, knees drawn up to his chest, face red and blotchy from crying, eyes bloodshot, but there were no tears. It seemed he had no more left to cry.

Douxie silently sat next to him, waiting for him to make the first move, to say something first. After a few minutes, Carter slowly looked at him, taking in a shuddering breath. He shakily held out his hand and Douxie took it without hesitation. Carter tugged him forward and kissed him gently. He was still sad and angry, but he still kissed Douxie with just as much love as he always had.

They parted and Carter's lips quirked up in a small but sad smile. "Thank you." He said softly. "For everything." He pressed his forehead against Douxie's, squeezing his hand. "I love you too, Douxie. I really do."