I Should've Known: Book Two

Hazel

Mrs. LaRue almost died. She actually died for a few moments until CPR saved her.

I'm so sore, but I still wait in the waiting room with Madds. Mr. LaRue soon arrives and he says things to Madds. She frantically says things back and then sobs in his arms.

I quietly watch them as I hold onto Matthew. He finally fell asleep. He was really uncomfortable after what happened. I think it startled him. But I softly hummed to him as I walked down the hallway and around the waiting room. He was sound asleep after ten long minutes of continuous walking. Now, my sore arms from doing CPR cry for me to just put him in the stroller, but he looks so cozy in my arms. I hold him close and close my eyes as I lean back in my chair. The world silences for once and I just hear the thumping sound of the pain in my finger.

"Dad?!"

My heart drops at the familiar sound of that voice. I immediately open my eyes and I have to swallow down the dryness in my mouth when Adam steps in the room. He does not see me at this corner of the room. He comes in and immediately comforts his sister. He's so kind. He's always been so sweet. Then he turns to talk to his father, but his eyes land on me when he sees me past his shoulder.

That's all I need to have that flutter of emotions back. Sadness. Nerves. Heaviness.

Love...

I swallow down the tears of such flood of emotions. It's overwhelming and they can see it. Madds sees it as she turns her sad eyes to worry. She comes over to take Matthew from my arms and locks eyes with me for a moment before she puts him in his stroller. I let out a small breath as I see Adam tell his father something before slowly coming up to me. He gives me the same nerdy wave he always gives me when he catches my eyes with that sad smile.

"Hey."

"Hey." I clear my throat and give him a brief smile before I stutter again.

I hear him do a small chuckle and say, "It's good to see you again. Are you doing alright? I've tried to check up on you but--"

"I don't need you to check on me."

Gosh. No wonder he broke up with you.

I clear my throat and gently say, "I'm sorry. It's been a long day. I'm sorry about your mother."

"She's strong. Thank you for saving her. I was told you were the one doing the compression."

"We all know the code blue drill. Your sister was much better at it though."

"But you saved her. Thank you. And...I'm sorry for...not reaching out. You must understand that it was hard for me, too. It still hurts. Are you doing alright?"

I sigh. He is genuinely worried for me and it stabs my heart. I wish he didn't care, but I think that would hurt me even more.

Why am I feeling this way again? Shut it off. Move on. It doesn't matter anymore.

I wish he could leave. Why can't he leave? It hurts to hear his voice again. But he won't leave if I don't lie to him. So I give him a tight smile and softly say, "I'm doing okay. Just working. You left your ties. The old ones you put in the closet."

"And I see you found your guitar, too." He gives me that warm smile that twists my stomach and points at the stroller. I see that Madds put it under her stroller and my heart melts at her sweet gesture. I forgot about it.

"Oh. Yeah. I came to play to your mother before she..."

Adam does a quiet nod. "I didn't know you play."

"Well now you know. I didn't know your mother was a musician."

Adam does that warm chuckle that makes my heart cry. "Yes. She tried to make us musicians, but we certainly did not have the gift."