✰ Rap Star ⤑ Changlix

11

"Felix," I hear someone call me.
I turn and meet eyes with Seungmin. "Oh, hey Minnie. What's up?"
"Minho told me you wanted to sing for a performance you are doing. He said I should ask you if you really want to go through with it, and if you do, I can help!"
Minho could've just told me himself. I guess he's not exactly good at confronting people after an argument. It wasn't that big of a deal. Still, he took my thoughts into consideration. I smile and nod. "I wanted to rap since I'm not that good at singing."
Seungmin nods. "The song is Myself by Bazzi, right? Minho sent it to me. Actually, I split up your parts already. I'll explain it when we get to the studio room," the vocalist says.
When we arrive, I see Hyunjin and Minho talking to a face I've only seen once. I'm pretty sure his name is Jeongin. "I brought lover boy," Seungmin calls into the room.
I roll my eyes and wave lazily. "Good, now we can go over the lyrics," Hyunjin claps his hand together. I guess he's really excited. Minho looks away. I walk over and wrap my arms around him, whispering a thank you. I wish I could tell him why it is I want to sing. I can't yet though.
"Well, since you guys aren't in a music major like Jeongin and I, I had an idea for the performance. Feel free to decline but, what if Jeongin and I joined it? It would mean less lines for you to memorize, and it would be more stable vocal wise. I'm not an amazing dancer, but Jeongin and I have at least some experience with it," Seungmin's idea isn't a bad one. The less lines I have to memorize the better.
"I like it," Hyunjin says. Minho quickly agrees and I nod along with him.
"I split it up the best I could. I don't know how much of the choreography you got done but, hopefully we don't need to make too many edits," Jeongin hands over a piece of paper for us to look at.
I have the most lines, but that's because it's the rapping part. "I think it's good. We can have Hyunjin and Jeongin kick it all off. We don't need to change much of the choreography at all. Just Felix's part. If he's doesn't dance for the first half I think that'd be better. It'll give a shock to fans when he pops in with his deep voice. It won't be as hard for him either," Minho starts scribbling on the paper, rearranging parts.
We spend the next few hours practicing and perfecting the movements. Of course, it doesn't all come together in a day. We meet up a lot to correct things until it's close to perfect. Minho and I are the ones to stay back for the final night we have to practice. Tomorrow I have to present Changbin's song for his class and the day after is the performance. I groan, rolling onto my back. Dancing is hard but rapping with it is even harder. It's been rough. We only had so much time on our hands to finish everything. I'm pretty sure I skipped more sleep than I ever have before. It's all worth it in the end. Not only am I getting closer to Minho and Hyunjin, but I'm giving Changbin a huge present. I smile up at the ceiling. Right, Changbin is my motivation.
I hear the door swing open slowly, causing me to look up with a strained neck. Jisung walks into the room, smiling at his boyfriend. I'm pretty sure I'm invisible. That or he thinks I'm dead. I probably look like shit. They talk quietly, but I overhear a few things.
"What do you mean?" Minho asks.
"I don't know. Changbin seems different lately. He's always been the go with the flow type, but he's been making changes to his schedule. He's canceled on our practice a few times the last month. It's confusing. Plus, his music taste has completely switched. He keeps playing love songs. There are moments in class where I catch him smiling at his phone. I think he's dating someone," Jisung whines to his boyfriend.
"And? He can't date someone?"
"Of course he can, but he hasn't mentioned it. It kind of sucks. Plus, it's not always a happy Changbin we see. He was so grumpy today, I wanted to smack him. Wack! Right into his dumb neck," Jisung makes sound effects for his statement.
I think back over the week. Besides working on our song, I haven't seen him much. He keeps leaving me on read as well. Has he been having a bad time? He did say his classes were stressing him out. I push myself up quietly and leave the studio after collecting my things. I dial my boyfriends number. It rings a few times before I hear my his voice from the other line.
"Felix?"
"Hey, what are you up to?" I push the doors open to the buildings exit.
"I was napping."
"Shit, did I wake you up? I'm sorry, babe. Go back to sleep."
"No, it's fine. I needed to wake up soon anyway. Deadlines are this weekend so I need to finish stuff. I should be thanking you for calling," he tells me this, but I don't feel any better. He works so hard.
"Aren't you working too much?" I ask.
"Nope. I'll die before I get a bad grade for these classes," he tells me.
I guess music means way more to him than I've ever realized. He takes his classes so seriously. Sure, he's a natural, but there's so much hard work he puts into it as well. "Changbin," I call his name, to which he responds with a hum. "What do you want to do after college? Don't you graduate in two years? You have a lot of time, babe. You don't need to rush it."
It's silent for a moment. "Actually, I don't know what I'm doing. It just feels natural to work my ass off for something. Overworking doesn't feel so bad. Especially if it's with music. I just want to be good enough. I don't know what I want to do with it. I don't think I want to be an idol, at least not one of those boy group members. Working with 3racha professionally has always been my dream, but I don't know how realistic that is. I'll probably just try to find a label that will accept me as a producer."
"What did I say about you telling me you aren't good enough?" I grumble.
"I can't help it. It's just how I feel. Everyone feels worthless sometimes. Like they chose the wrong road," he says. His voice is growing a bit hoarse. He's probably trying not to cry.
"Changbin, you didn't choose the wrong path. Music is your calling. Even if you slack off, everything you make will be a masterpiece. Would Chris and Jisung still be in a group with you after two years if they thought you weren't talented? You're worth it. If you want to go professional with them, talk with them. I have no doubt you can do it. It will be hard. That's not an easy career to go through with and I know it's scary, but you aren't alone. You have your friends and you have me. I'll support you if that's what you want to do. I speak for everyone when I say you are made for music. When you are on stage you are a completely different person. You are so amazing. If you don't want to sit in an office for the rest of your life, then don't. Don't live that boring life," I say a lot more than first intended, but I'm satisfied anyway. Everything that escapes my mouth is true.
"You're too nice, Felix," he chokes out. Now I know for sure he's crying. "You can't just say you'll support me so easily. It makes me feel like an asshole. You have your own life to map out."
"I haven't found my calling yet, it's fine. When I do, I won't hesitate to go for it. While I figure that out, I'll be your support beam. No, I'll always be your support beam. When I find that calling, you better be mine as well," I hear him laugh at my metaphor. Good, he's laughing. I smile to myself. I want to hug him.
"Of course I'll support you. What kind of boyfriend am I if I can't even do that for the person I love?" I wrinkle my nose and snort. "I'm serious Felix. I love you," he tells me this with a more stern tone.
"I know. I can feel it through the song you wrote. I love you too. We'll get through it together. So stop stressing out so much. Your music is amazing. Let yourself be satisfied, okay? If you change it too much, it won't show everyone your emotion and message," I say, stopping at the bus stop outside the school.
"You're so perfect," he compliments.
"I'm far from perfect, honey," I disagree.
"No, you're perfect. I love you," he reminds me again.
"I know, you said it already. I love you too."
"I love you."
"Changbin, you are making me cringe. Stop," I laugh out, my arm crossing over my chest. It's a bit cold out.
"Accept my love," he whines.
"I accept it and I gift you with mine. Now go to sleep."
"It's only ten-thirty."
I look at the time on my phone. He's right. "That's earlier than I thought it was. Well, if you aren't going to sleep, come pick me up and take me home. I missed the last bus," I tell him.
"You're still at school?"
"Yeah, I had to stay back and fix something on my assignment," I lie.
"So you are by the library?" Changbin asks.
"Yeah," I lie again. I'm actually by the gymnasium, but I can make it to the stop by the library in less than five minutes.
"I'll be there in ten," he says, quickly hanging up.
I laugh at his hurried words and make my way to the bus stop he's planning to pick me up at. When he arrives, I hop into the car and turn on the warm air. "It's freezing," I say through chattering teeth.
"You didn't bring a jacket?" Changbin asks, grabbing my hands and rubbing them to warm them up.
"I forgot it. I wasn't planning on staying so late," I reply.
Changbin hums, entwining his right hand with my left one. He presses his lips to the back of mine. Our eyes meet and instantly there's a tension between us. Not a bad one. I lean closer, my hand falling onto his thigh. His free hand meets my cheek, pulling my face closer to his. Just before our lips can link for a kiss, the Bluetooth in the car shares a loud ringing. Han.J pops up on the screen. Changbin groans in frustration and smacks the green button.
"What?" He lets out in an upset tone.
I try my best to hold in my laugh as Jisung responds with a stutter. "Sorry, are you busy?"
"Yes. What do you need?"
"Well I was just wondering,"
"Don't wonder, I'll call you back," Changbin quickly hangs up, turning back to me. He tries to bring me close again for a kiss, but I pull away and pout. "Call him back don't be a jerk."
Changbin's face smacks onto the steering wheel with a loud and frustrated noise. "Come on, I'll kiss you all you want afterward."
My boyfriend hesitates for a second before hitting the call button on the screen.
"That was fast," Jisung laughs.
"I got scolded for being a prick," Changbin says, his eyes moving toward me. He's glaring childishly. I just smile.
"Scolded?" Jisung asks.
"I'm with someone right now."
"Oh, you're with someone," Jisung repeats it. A second later, his voice is high pitched and squeaky. "Oh my good you ARE dating someone."
"Yeah. I'm gonna introduce you on my birthday. I'm not going to be home tonight so have Minho over if you want," I raise a brow at Changbin. He sends me a smirk which sends my heart into a frenzy. This charming bastard.
"Okay, sounds good. I'll see you on your birthday."
The call ends with short goodbyes and I tilt my head at my boyfriend. "So, you're staying over then?"
"That a problem?" Changbin's face shows actual worry just in case he is going to impose on my plans.
I don't have any, so I reassure him with, "it's fine. Though, you aren't getting anything but kisses from me."
"Yeah, yeah, playing hard to get. I wasn't expecting anything more anyway."