My Winter

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Winter's pov:

Her eyes and jaw twitched as I told her how he, "swept me off my feet". I don't think she was pleased. When our server dropped off our meal and asked if we needed anything else, she didn't say anything. She didn't even look at her food. She continued to look at me, like she was contemplating.

"Gli farò del male." She finally said in her native tounge. She grabbed her glass of champagne and downed it. "Pensavo di averlo cresciuto meglio di così!"

There was silence again as she ate her food. It looked like a fancy chicken parmasan salad. It honestly looked really good.

I couldn't hold myself back from the shrimp pasta. Shrimp is like the only thing I can eat from the ocean. Lobster and fish makes my stomach sick.
And yes, I did try and understand what she said. Only caught bits and pieces. I can't wait till I fully understand it so I'm not always so confused.

"Did he ever hurt you?" She asked, halfway through her meal.

"No," I answered instantly. "He scared me, but he never hurt me."

"Well, at least something came out of it." She mumbled.

I didn't understand what she mean't. When she saw my confusion, she shrugged it off.

"Did you ever try getting away? If so, what made you stop?"

"I wanted to, even tried planning on it when he took me sight seeing, but he seemed to be steps ahead of me." I licked my lips and took my fork and played with my food. "I knew, no matter how far I seemed I got away, he would've found me. I didn't want to run for the rest of my life. I didn't want to be scared for the rest of my life. I wanted to live and be happy. Away from my father. I was happy when Nicallowed me to continue my residency even though he didn't need me to." She nodded her head, seeming to understand. "And yes," I continued. "He asked to give him a chance, and I am."

"Are you happy?" She seemed concerned about me. Her eyes filled with worry and her Italian accent was smooth and sad.

I bit inside of my cheek, thinking. Was I? "This is the happiest I've been in a while. I would be happier if I didn't have to worry about Lucien and could continue my residency." I hoped that satisfies her for an answer.

Because, they're were times when I was truly happy. Especially with Nicolas. But more and more recently I felt depressed. Perhaps that's because I haven't able to go out until now. I guess I don't understand what people mean when they ask, 'are you happy'.
All my life, I've felt like I've been on a roller coaster. Like, I feel happy. But, before long, I'm sad and upset.

I was surprised how quickly Nic gave in to his mom to let me go out to lunch with her. I thought he would've tried to tell her no and the reasons for it.

"I understand." She nodded her head and sighed. "My late husband and I were a arranged marriage." She began. "We didn't hate each other, but we also didn't love each other. I would've been happier if my father hadn't been stupid and I could have continued my degree in science." She lifted her head up to the sky as I saw her eyes become glossy. "Overtime, I had to, accommodate, my situation. I was the queen of the mafia. That was a lot of pressure for me. There were times I was happy and times were I became depressed. My husband demanded that I became a housewife. Said, 'no woman of mine will work'. I could only dream of curing cancer." She looked back me with sadness in her eyes. "There were times where I was very grateful of my position. I was able to donate funds to help with charity and science. I even donated to hospitals who's patients were filled cancer." Then she smiled. "Then I became pregnant with Nicolas. I was scared because I thought I wasn't ready to be a mother. But the monet I held him in my arms, I knew. I knew I could do this. Raise him to be a wonderful, caring man and a prefect gentleman. That's why, at the moment, I am not, happy with him." I pressed my lips and nodded my head, now understanding by what she meant earlier.