Hiding In Plain Sight | Kylo Ren & Knights of Ren X OC

Chapter 22

Author's Note: Welcome back to Hiding in Plain Sight! I hope you enjoy this update! Thank you to all those who read along. Enjoy some Toxic emo Space Prince, and his long suffering apprentice/lover haha... As always I love your feedback, I hope you enjoy this, and see you in the next one! - Lex

-Nova- 

"You're a fucking asshole, Kylo Ren," You muttered to yourself as you flew your new Tie Zannah at breakneck speed toward the co-ordinates of the Rebel base. Then, it occurred to you, you were being as impulsive as him, "What am I doing?" you hit the comms, "Hux?"

"Yes, Apprentice Ren?" Came his almost immediate response.

You took a deep breath, "Send Trooper units, and TIE Fighters. I have something I need to see to, and we should gather what we can from their data banks, I can't do that alone."

"Supreme Leader Ren is on his way, I will send Trooper Units immediately."

"Thank you, Hux."

"No problem, are you coming back here?" Hux asked tentatively, you had a fraught friendship that was sometimes friendly, sometimes not.

"Yes. I need a few things when I get back. But I need to go purchase a few things first." You were so tired. Not just of Kylo, but of everything. Things had been toying with your mind since you had found out your history and everything to do with Pryde and your childhood. It was playing on your mind constantly, a crisis of identity but how could you talk to anyone? Who was there that could possible understand and have advice about being thousands of years old. You were alone in this universe. A relic of a time past. You felt like you were some pretty little item that Pryde had stolen from some long, lost tomb for little more than glory and wealth. But how was you meant to explain that to everyone? How you felt like every time you found out a little more about yourself... you felt a little more of who you were slipping through your fingers. That you felt like your whole self had been slashed open and the gaping wound was leaking your very understanding of who you even were. The Knights would be nice and sweet but they wouldn't get it. And Kylo... well Kylo had proven his mind was far too egotistical to be worth trying to explain things to... You snapped from your thoughts at the sound of Hux's voice.

"Of course, Apprentice Ren."

"I'll be back in a few hours, let Kylo know I'm not on base. He'll ask where I am, tell him I didn't say anything other than I aren't there and to send troopers." With that, you ended the comms connection.

You flew the TIE Zannah to the closest planet that you knew would have decent shopping. You were done with Kylo and his bullshit. You were little more than a toy for him, and you had so much more important things on your mind. Things that were literally devouring your heart and your mind, and every time you gave him your energy did he just add to the collossal pile of bullshit swimming through your thoughts. And though the Knights had been nothing but nice... maybe you had become their toy too without realising it. Always available. Always theirs. You needed to focus on yourself and your career again. Get your focus back. Get yourself back. Work out who you were, and who you want to be going forward. You never had such drama or heartache when you had no friends and no relationships. You had work, and partying with strangers and it worked. No drama, no pain, no bullshit. You wanted that peace back in your life.

You landed and headed straight out into the city, shopping and buying clothing that you would have bought before the Sith Robes and the name change to Ren. You were desparately trying to cling to yourself. Who you felt you were, who you had once been so sure you were. This was you, this was who you were... wasn't it? Slashed clothes, worn leather and denim, band t-shirts and tattoos. And damn it, you deserved it. It had been the worst birthday ever. So now you were fixing it with some damn self care and self spoiling. You grabbed item after item, hammering your credit unit. You headed and got a new tattoo, using information from the Sith data bank about your real mother and iconography from the Brotherhood of Darkness. Skulls, red lightsaber shaped like her mothers crossed with her own, robed figures and a Hammerhead Corvette. Sitting and feeling the scratch and burn of the ink pressed into the skin, was almost cathartic. It was a release, and you weren't sure if that was a good thing, or deeply unhealthy.