Falling For Henry Cavill

Dismissed!

Naturally, when I heard the news of my "dismissal," I went into panic mode wondering what I would do next or whether I should go back home which was definitely my last option. I could not live the place that I had come to love and where I had met a family that I loved and loved me back, and not only believed as I believed but did as I did and trusted in the Lord as I did with their faith in God leading their every decision, or at least tried to. This was not a group of acquaintances or people I knew. No, this was a group of people who were every bit as important in my life as anyone else. They were a family that I could come to when at my worst. Even Emma, now age 20 who was only 15 years old when I got here, was my own personal confidant who knew what to say and was as spiritual if not more than myself. Her, Maggie, Millie, John, Edward, the Allen's and even Eva and Ethan were as supportive as ever and were happy to pray and fast for me so I could find a job.

Being dismissed from my eight hour teaching job at Mount Nicole School forced me to enter the world of online schooling. I decided that I should try applying to an upcoming online school named VIP Kids and teaching English, not acting, to kids in China. Afraid of being unable to pay for bills and the home I shared with Maggie, I quickly applied for everything and submitted my video of teaching English to Asian kids. Energetic and full of life, my video of saying words in English in a manner easy to understand for those listening was uploaded and reviewed by the next day. It included the time and date of a virtual interview. During the preparation of the interview, I was also called by the zoo to interview for a position as a groundskeeper. Counting myself blessed to have interviews for 2 different types of jobs after a week of being dismissed by my last employer, I was finally feeling more optimistic about my perspective of staying on the island of Jersey, England, my current and forever home with the exception of the yearly two week vacations to Mexico during the summer and for the Christmas holidays. I knew that Jersey was to be my forever home for many reasons whether I met my future husband or not. I really kept the hope that I would find my husband here. I couldn't fathom living elsewhere even if my husband asked me to do so.

Finding a husband was hard business. Millie was after Edward for a good while before they were engaged. Maggie did not date anyone out of choice. She said that guys were too much work which I agreed with but not wholeheartedly. I was open to anyone but there weren't many guys in the church I wanted to date. I liked John, but I just never let him know it because I believed he would ask me if he liked me. Although there had been several guys from work that took me out on dates, I did not find myself naturally gravitated to them or felt myself attached to them. Not even John who I liked and had special moments of solace and long gazes with. One evening after a scripture study group, he and I were headed to Millie's to hang out. Maggie had to work late that evening and said she would meet us there and Millie and Edward rode in his 2 seater car. No one else was there when we got there, so we sat in the driveway waiting for all of them to arrive. As we did, he drew me a picture of an ogre that read, "you are the apple of my eye." I did not think anything of it and we continued talking about things. There were also times at church where we found ourselves gazing at each other during Sunday school classes. Overtime, when he met another girl named Isabella from Guernsey, she took all his attention and they began dating.  He still went over to the house to talk when he wanted to talk about something that bothered him or when he wanted my advice on something. She had the courage that I lacked and asked him out. They started dating while Maggie and I were either keeping to ourselves or were helping Millie plan her wedding.

I, being out of work, had no time to engage in romance adventures. I was on a mission, a mission to stay in Jersey for the rest of my life even if I had to clean up animal feces at the zoo or do anything else they might need me to do. I was told that they would call me regardless of whether or not I got the job. I was beside myself and then the interview for a tutoring service also came, so I did not have too much time to be nervous. Instead, I was in a state of awareness that I had not been in before. Grant it, none of these were teaching jobs. The schools I had reached out to were not hiring a theater teacher so I made the best of it and counted my blessings with the interviews I was getting. In twenty-six years of my life I had never before felt so disheveled and bombarded. I did the interview with VIP Kids and soon I was to start tutoring students from the comfort of my home. I truly felt that by twenty-six years old I would be married in the church and have at least one kid or two- a dream that I had since I was 13 years old. This was probably because most of the couples that I knew in my faith usually found love and were married by their early twenties. This of course was not to be my fortune in life. Instead I was doing everything in my power to look for a job after being let go from my career path to stay in a place dear to me, had no success in the romance department, and was headed into a path as oblique as a cave. Depending solely in my faith in God, I found a sense of comfort and peace amidst the sudden chaos that was my life. I made sure that I said my personal prayers and read my scriptures day and night, it was the only thing I could do to keep me going. I set up the living room as a classroom so that when I tutored my students they would feel like there were in a classroom. I also did it cause the agency said to. There was a rolling chalkboard that the Allens gave me that I decorated with things that I had used in my classroom at Mount Nicolle School. This adorned one of the walls in the living room so that i could pull it behind me when I was tutoring the students because my computer desk was against the wall beside the television. Unfortunately, parents were to pick their kids teacher solely on the appearance of the teacher not qualifications, so I did not get a single student to tutor on VIP kids right away. While I waited, somewhat impatiently to get a student, the zoo called and asked when I could start. Filled with glee, I told them I could start immediately and I was told to be there at 7:00 am the next day with boots or tennis shoes and some khaki's. Right when I was about to doubt if my heavenly father heard my prayers, I was suddenly aware that He was aware of me and my needs. I felt both loved and blessed by Him. That night I said a fervent prayer thanking Him for giving me the opportunities to provide for myself and to stay in a place I considered a home.