Laurelle's Letter (Completed)

Epilogue

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Lucas,

    Hey, I made this letter in case I won't get the chance to welcome another tomorrow, but I'm also hoping for a twist of fate so you won't have to read this, but if ever you do, I hope you won't cry too much.

  
   I'm sorry for making you feel this kind of pain again. I know it'll hurt you so much, but hey, just hug our dogs and you'll never feel alone. Are you mad at me for leaving you too soon? I'm sorry. You can be mad at me, hate me if you want... I'll be okay.

   I already expected this to happen and it's my choice to keep this from you. I don't want you to be in danger. I just found out that Jeno is the son of the former Mayor who killed your parents. (I'm sorry for mentioning it here.)

 
   The reason why Jeno got into our story was because, I tried to forget this feeling I have for you. I know you like me too, I'm aware about your feelings for me... and I am really grateful for it. Imagine, my first love, likes me too!

  
   I let Jeno court me for the sake of forgetting my growing feelings for you. I thought that I needed it so I can stop fantasizing about our fake relationship.

   I don't want you to like me because you deserve better. You're just too good for me. You don't deserve someone who's dirty, unstable, and with a complicated life.

   I guess I liked you the very first time we met. I couldn't forget how you complimented me through your eyes. That eyes of yours... that was the most beautiful pair of eyes I've ever seen.

 
   Being loved by you was the most beautiful thing that has ever happened to me. I'm sorry for not reciprocating your love. I was just too scared to lose you if ever things won't work out.

  I know I've hurt you big time the very moment I told you that I let Jeno court me. I'm assuming these words kept running in your mind. "Bakit hindi nalang ako?" "ako naman ang nasa tabi niya lagi, ah." was I right? hahaha.

   Well, maybe I can tell you about me now... cause by the time you're reading this... I'm probably gone by now.

   When I was only 11 years old, I learned how to earn money so I can provide for my own needs. I left my used to be home because I could not longer take the actions of my abusive father. My goal that time was to work very hard and earn a lot of money so I can get my mom away from that abusive monster. I satisfy myself by secretly watching my mom from a far.

  Seven years of working while trying to save money and at the same time providing for myself, a shocking news broke my entire system... my mom died. She killed herself. I thought she was too selfish for not thinking about me... but maybe she was already tired.

   I thought maybe that was the last painful thing I'll be experiencing in my life... but my uncle raped me while I'm still mourning for my deceased mother.

   The only solution I could think that time was to kill myself so I could already end my sufferings... but a suicidal guy saved me, and it happened to be you. My days with you were filled with colors and rainbows. Sabi nga ng lyrics sa isang kanta 'There's a rainbow always after the rain.' You were that rainbow after that pain.