I hate loving you - Eddie Munson

"HAVE YOU GOT A PROBLEM MUNSON?"

I walked home sat on my bed and began to sob, I cried until I had no more tears to cry, until my eyes were red and puffy. I splash my face with water trying to hide at least a little bit of the puffiness.

I don't know if I'm crying because of Jason and Cassie or because of Eddie. I can't get him out my head, I hate him so much, yet he's all I can think about, I think he's stupid and annoying but I find myself being drawn to him. The only explanation for this behaviour is that I don't want to admit that Jason and I are no longer together or won't be for long. And the reason I can't stop thinking about Eddie is because I need something else to focus on.

I take a deep breath in, put on a pair of shorts and a jumper, I grab my walk-man and press play, music fills my ears and it instantly relaxes me. I tie up my converse and decide to go on a run.

Running down my road I see Jason's car, I run up to the window and look in, but what I see breaks my heart. Cassie and Jason, Jason's hand around cassies neck, their lips together. I don't know what comes over me but next thing I know I'm punching the window swearing at them, shouting at the top of my lungs.

"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING" I scream
"Jess you're causing a scene" Jason says calmly.
"I'm causing a scene? Me? What the fuck. Screw you Jason and your fucking whore"
I turn to storm off and realise I have attracted a crowed. Including Eddie who just stands there smiling at me. My blood boils and I storm up to him.
"HAVE YOU GOT A FUCKING PROBLEM MUNSON?" I shout right in his face. I push him, punch him and scream at him. But he just stands there, calm, hardly moving. He grabs my wrists and slightly steps back creating space between us, stopping my violence. I look at his face but it just makes me so much more angry than what I was before.

"You know what, fuck this, fuck everyone" I walk off heading back to my home and I can see Jason smirking through his window. I thought I hated Eddie the most in this world, but I think Jason has just topped that. I was an idiot to ever believe his lies, he took me for a fool and I just proved him right.

"Are you okay darling" my mum says as soon as I walk through the door. I didn't want to talk right now so I just ignored her and ran upstairs slamming my door behind me. I flop onto my bed letting myself sink into my mattress and wrapping myself up in a blanket, which is now wet from tears. I cry, for what feels like hours, I cry until I am so exhausted My eyes close and I sleep.

I don't think I moved in 3 days, I didn't go to school, I didn't leave the house, I barely left my room - only to use the bathroom. My mum would bring me food everyday, but I wouldn't touch it. I felt heartbroken but the embarrassment was the thing keeping me locked up in my room. It felt like a prison, but I didn't want to leave, and I wouldn't have left if my mum didn't practically drag me out the house and into school.

I tried to be confident, I really did. But I could feel everyone's eyes on me. I kept my head down, I could hear the whispers "did you hear he cheated on her?" And all the laughs the looks. I decided to just go and hide in the toilet between lessons, I didn't want to be the centre of attention, not anymore. I slide into the nearest bathroom and look in the mirror at my pathetic reflection. When the door opens I quickly get into a cubical. This is now where I spend most my time. I make sure I'm on time to lessons and keep my head down. I don't need any fake friends at the moment.
Constantly I see Chrissy and Jason in the corridors hand in hand, they look so in love, I wonder if that's how I looked to everyone, because it now makes me feel sick.

I bump into Dustin and Mike who are frantically running around.
"Oh hello Jess" Dustin looks and Mike and raises his eyebrows.
"No dude, she won't do it" Mike looks at me "sorry he's being weird" he shoves Dustin which makes me laugh a little.
"What is it?" I ask looking at Dustin.
"Well, you see, I was wondering if you would maybe do me a favour?" He smiles
I roll my eyes "what do you want me to do now" I smile at them.
"Would you come along with us and maybe okay a game of  D and D?" I smile, when I used to babysit the pair of them we would spend hours playing that game.
"Of course I will" little did I know what I was getting myself into.
"Great, meet us here..." he wrote down an address and handed it to me on a crumpled piece of paper "at 7pm sharp"
I smile and walk off.

By 6:30 I am dressed and ready to head off to the mystery location. I can't help but feel slightly excited to let off a bit of steam. And even if it is a rubbish night at least it's getting my mind off of everything.
I put on a pair of jeans, a bodysuit style top and a denim jacket. I then tie my hair up into a bun - because I hadn't washed it in a few days.

I walk to the address on the paper, and stand at the door, just as I'm about to knock, Dustin shouts from behind me. "HEY JESS OVER HERE!" I jog over to them and look around.
"Who's house is this? Neither of you have moved right?" They look at each other
"Well it's a tournament this is the opposites teams house- we don't know them as of yet"
"We are just waiting for one more team mate... oh wait never mind there he is" I turn around expecting Luca or maybe even will might have travelled back down for this. But no who's stood at the end of the driveway when I look around? Eddie.