AT YOUR SERVICE

37. Whiplash

Y/N POV

As I lay in bed and stare at the ceiling, all my thoughts are filled with Jimin's actions and Namjoon's advice. Namjoon is right. No one can tell me what to do but me. I'm the one that knows what I want and what I can handle. I'm the only one that can say what I want and I decide what I put up with and what I don't. Only I know what I'm comfortable with and Jimin making me the bad guy every time I feel a situation isn't fair isn't something I'm ok with. If he and I are to make this work, I have to stop letting him manipulate the situation to what he wants and stand my ground. If he gets upset then he gets upset but I have to stop feeling bad when he does. I care for him so much but I can't keep doing this with him or to myself.

I take a deep breath and center my thoughts. I'll put it to rest for tonight and deal with this when the time comes. But for now, I have to let it go. I get up and go grab my pajamas so I can shower and get ready for bed. Once I'm all clean and ready to turn in, I hear a knock at my door. I look at the clock on my nightstand. 2am. One guess as to who that could be. I take a deep breath and walk to the door as the knocks are heard once more.

I grab the door handle and take one last breath in to calm my crazy beating heart before I open it and come face to face with the man that's been on my mind all night. Jimin.

He looks mad, hurt, annoyed and relieved all at once. He looks me straight in my eyes before he speaks.

"Can I come in?" I can smell the liquor on his breath.

"That depends. How much did you drink?" I ask. Talking with him while he's drunk will get us nowhere.

"The same amount as you did at dinner." he scoffs. I take in his form and decide he's telling the truth. I've seen Jimin drunk and that's not what he is right now so I step aside and let him in.

"What do you need, Jimin?" I ask.

"I thought you wanted to talk." he scoffs again.

"I did. You said we had nothing to talk about so I'll ask again. What do you need?" I cross my arms across my chest and walk over to sit on the chair by the bed where he's sitting.

"Why were you with him?" I guess we're not gonna beat around the bush tonight.

"Because he asked me to spend time with him."

"Do you like him?"

"Why do you always think I have romantic feelings for everyone I talk to?"

"Just answer the question, Y/N."

"No, Jimin. This is stupid. I have every right to speak to and spend time with whoever I want. I don't have to tell you anything. You have no right to ask me that."

"Why are you making this an argument? Just answer the question."

"I'm not answering anything. You can assume whatever you want. I'm not entertaining your delusional thoughts."

"Do you have feelings for him? Is Namjoon the reason you won't commit to me? You said you wanted us to be together and now you don't. I'm just trying to understand why–."

"This is why!" I gesture to us. "Because I can't even have a conversation with someone without you getting all upset and bothered. Because I can't just make a friend without you assuming I'm in love with them or fucking them. Because even though you've given me every reason not to trust you, I'm somehow the one paying for it when you're the one who doesn't trust me. And for what reason, I have no idea."

"He had his arms around you! He was holding your hand! You think I didn't see that?"

"He was holding my hand to ease my anxiety and friends hug, Jimin!"