Wallflower || NH

09 (Illusion)

End of the chapter song: Nasty freestyle by T-Wayne

Katrine's POV

I let Niall touch me. His large hands roamed all over my body, touching my clothed body. The only thing separating his touch to my bare body is my clothes, and I think he will rip them out in any second.

Why me? Why does this have to happen to me?

Out of all the hundreds of girls in this school he has to choose me. Why not Kate Smith? The popular cheerleader that got a boob job and has all the boys drooling and chasing after her.

All of a sudden, Niall stops touching me, and takes a few steps back.

"What the fuck am I doing?" He whispers to himself while he looks to his hands.

He looks back up at me in a face expression that looks like he just realized he committed murder.

"Shit. Get out!" He yelled at me, still looking at me in the eyes.

I don't hesitate to do what he said. I quickly run out the room; exiting the school building.

I keep on running, not finding myself slowing down any time soon.

How do you know when it's over? How do you know if you don't love him anymore?

Maybe when you feel more in love with the memories then the person standing right in front of you.

I miss the old Niall. The one that made me laugh, and the one that would hold me when I cried.

Why did he had to change for others? He changed so he could get in the soccer team. He changed so he could pick up girls easier. He changed so he could hang out with the cool kids.

But he never changed for love. He never even had to change in the first place. He was perfect just the way he was.

But I guess nothing lasts forever; not even life itself.

I kept on running until I reached my house. I got in and I ran in my room. I throw myself in bed and I start to cry again.

Head spinning, body sweating and skin feeling like it will rip off in any second.

I feel so disgusting, so used and betrayed. I lost the old Niall and I also lost Nick. And to make matters worse I don't have my mother to talk to as girl to girl and my father isn't here to be over protective about me.

But it's just a bad day right? Not a bad life. But sometimes these type of things are what keeps the razor blade slicing my skin open. But I'm the one that's making the force of it, but it's because of life.

Why does life have to be so-

My phone rings from my back pocket, so I wipe off my tears before grabbing it.

"H-hello?" I stutter with a crying voice.

"Kat are you crying?" Brook's voice fills my ear.

I sniff a couple of times while wiping under my eyes with the inside collar of my shirt.

"Well I-I was-"

"You have to take your mind off of things," she interrupts me. "There's a party tonight that I'm invited to and I want you to come."

There's a deep silence in between us before I decided to talk. "Brook I don't know. I just went through-"

"C'mon! Please girl you need to get out and lose your mind with loud music and alcohol. All this shit will stress you out even more and you'll end up doing something stupid."