𝐀𝐧 𝐔𝐧𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐲 𝐓𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫 | 𝕃𝕠𝕜𝕚'𝕤 𝔸𝕗𝕗𝕝𝕚𝕔𝕥𝕚𝕟𝕘 𝕃𝕠𝕧𝕖

Sunrise at Snowdrop Cliff

You stayed away from people for the rest of the night, instead deciding to tuck yourself up to Fenrir and Cerberus.

You sighed, twisting in Fenrir's fur, trying to get comfortable. Yet no matter what position you ended in, your mind refused to allow you to escape into comfort.

Your nagging brain would not switch off, it would not allow you to sleep. Not when you kept replaying the conversations with Prince Beren and Loki.

Unification sounded dreadful. You imagined this was another reason Odin was being nice. He wanted you permanently bound for Asgard, to follow him as your King.

You, just another unique oddity he could collect.

Sly bastard.

You huff out a breath, giving up on trying to sleep. Deciding to get up and pace the room instead.

You remembered your planned date with Loki, yet were unsure if the sunrise watching was still on. Feeling indecisive if you should even go.

Handfast, marriage, unification.. am I forced to choose right away? why do I feel each one takes away part of my freedom, could I even go home?

You take a deep breath continuing to think deeply, walking back and forth until a sudden wave of nausea hit you. You dashed for the bathroom, immediately expelling your last meal.

You stood up and swilled your mouth with tap water, staring at yourself in the mirror.

Sudden doubt crept in, Prince Beren's words replaying in your head like a warning.

Don't bind with someone unworthy of you, chose a realm that treats you respectfully.

You're once again plagued with uncertainty.

You knew you felt something for Loki, but you were scared of what was beyond should you accept him fully into your heart. It meant accepting Asgard as your home and it's ruler. Odin.

Everything was so complicated.

You wondered if you were really sure of Loki when you still had your memories of him?

Was it just the faded memories that now made you unsure? Or have you both changed? ....are you even compatible with him now?

Your mind was consumed with so many thoughts it made your brain pound against your skull.

"I need to step back, it's going too fast. I need to be sure, be sure of Loki. Be sure of Asgard. I can't spend thousands of years in a mistake" you say out loud, talking to yourself in the mirror.

Thousands of years!... what's a few more days, weeks or even months. We have literally thousands of years..Loki can wait, he can be patient surely?

Your eyes felt the desire to close, your mind so fried it now screamed to rest, finally needing to shut off.

You lazily walked back to Fenrir yawning, finding a comfy spot and instantly falling asleep.

——————————————————

Your eyelids twitched hearing a light tapping, a gentle knock on the door.