Muted Anguish

CHAPTER 6: DREADFUL ENCOUNTER

KEISHA'S POV

Cameron and I had been dating for a month and things were pretty great. The stares and whispers we usually got anywhere we went with our hands clasped together seemed to have reduced drastically or maybe it was because we simply didn't give a damn about what people thought anymore. He'd also asked me to move in with him and I did. Harvey had generously vacated the apartment for us so Cameron and I lived alone together.

I nudged Bethany in the side, she'd been quiet since she walked into our apartment twenty minutes ago.
"Say something" I whispered.
Earlier, I'd been able to coax Cameron into letting Bethany come over for dinner so they could get along. Convincing Bethany to come over wasn't as easy, I literally had to drag her out the front door. To make matters worse, the dinner wasn't going exactly as I'd envisaged. It was a disaster.
"Don't you think it's a really bad idea for you to be studying human psychology? I mean what if one day you snap and beat up your client?" she spoke, catching us off guard.

"What the hell Beth?" I gave her the evil eye "Really? You wanna do this here? Now?"
I glanced at Cameron who was very still, then mouthed a "sorry"
"Just asking"
"That is one awkward way to start a conversation" He replied, forcing a smile but I could see he was uncomfortable. "But you see, Beth, I'm studying psychology so I can help people like me"
"What if you end up fucking them up wirh, say a punch? Instead of fixing them? You're pretty unpredictable. What if you lose it during a session and lash out?" She remarked icily and I sent a kick to her shin underneath the table. She winced.
"For fuck's sake, Beth!" My voice rose in anger "Stop it!" I glanced at Cameron again "Honey, I'm so sorry. Bethany's just plainly being a bitch" I turned to glare daggers at her again.
"What would you rather I say to him? Huh? Ask where he learnt to grill a steak or cook when the real question I've been dying to ask is why you beat Mike into a coma a year ago" she then gazed at Cameron "Weren't you supposed to have stopped when you noticed he was bleeding or when he lost consciousness?"
"Okay, that's enough" I got up peeved "Just stop already"
I looked over at Cameron again who was quiet, his fingers tightened around the wine glass.
"There's a reason it's called 'blinding rage'" He cleared his throat and paused for a second "I'm not proud of what I did and not a single day goes by without me being hunted by it. If I could take back my actions I would... without hesitation"

Cameron leaned forward in his seat and fixed Bethany a cold, hard stare "Mike was an assh*le but you wouldn't know that because you were never the object of his mockery. Every day he pushed me, goaded me and he enjoyed it. Took pleasure in watching me make efforts to control my anger around him until one day I just lost it"
Bethany shifted uneasily in her seat but Cameron kept talking.
"Did he deserve a beating? Yes. Did he deserve to be beaten to that state? No"
She remained mute.
"You think it's something I do for the fun of it? Huh? 'Okay I'm bored so I'm gonna beat his ass to a bloody pulp. Cool right? Hahaha,' You think it's something I can turn on and off like a switch? The anger?" He'd started to furiously tap a finger on the table. "People termed me a psychopath because of that. They call me a creep. They avoid me. They act like I chose to be this way, do you think I deserve any of that?"
I went over to his side and touched his arm to prevent him from speaking any further "Hey. It's okay. You don't have to explain anything to her. She's smart enough to have understood from the onset"
I frowned at Bethany again "I think you should go. You've already caused enough chaos"
She got up eagerly and headed for the door "Don't come crying to me when shit goes south"
I ignored her and wrapped my arms around Cameron as soon as the door closed shut behind her
"I'm so sorry. If I had known she was gonna act this way I wouldn't have invited her over"
"It's okay"

I kissed his hair and said sincerely "I'm really sorry. Gosh if I had just let things be as they were. Now it seems I've only made things worse between you too"
He ran a thumb along my cheek "People have said worse things to me. I'm still alive, aren't I? Just let it go"
"I can't believe she said all that"
"Keisha"
I lowered myself to his legs, sitting sideways "Sorry, sorry. I'm just...really really hating myself right now"
"Maybe I can help take your mind off it"
Before I could respond he brought his lips to mine and began to kiss me slowly. Kisses that made my wits cease functioning. There was something about Cameron's kiss that always left me panting with a desire I thought unquenchable.
"Stop" I broke the kiss and got off his legs. As I took his hand in mine to pull him up, I uttered in a low seductive tone "Let's go to your room"