They say when the sun sets, sunflowers face each other. But what if there was no other sunflower to turn to? What if each sunflower had been plucked out, leaving one to its misery, lone and terrified, with no kind of its own, a cruel world in its wa...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
|| TRACK : MALE FANTASY // BILLIE EILISH ||
[ TW : mentions of past forced abortion ]
"Harry, what has gotten into yo—," voice muffled by Harry's mouth on him, Harry kissed Zayn deeply. His body craving his touch. He felt the alpha stumble, haphazardly dropping his trolley bag somewhere as his arms locked around Harry and his leg kicked the door shut behind him. "Calm down. God."
"Want you," Harry whined. Pleaded. "Want you so bad." He wanted to forget the pain, allow Zayn to cloud him. He needed to feel anything but the pain that Louis caused. And perhaps that was what made Zayn halt, that utter urgency in Harry's voice, the look in Harry's eyes, his cold skin. "Please." Harry sobbed, trying to kiss Zayn again.
"Baby, wha-what's wrong?"
"Please," he cried, hugging Zayn, holding him like Harry was drowning. "Just fuck me. I need you."
"Harry, something's clearly happened. Talk to me, love."
"Just need you, Z. Make me forget it all, please." His heart only hurt more as he buried his nose in the crook of Zayn's neck. He needed warmth, to feel the love he had been denied of for so long. He needed to be reminded that he had someone, even if he only meant a lay for to them. "Make me forget him."
He had never felt Zayn go rigid before, but here he was, in the arms of an alpha who's face paled. Harry was not sure what to say, or to move, or to cry. Zayn looked at him like Harry was sand in his clutch, slipping away and away. His hands fell, his eyes darted away.
"You love him still." It wasn't a question. He was making a statement. Broken words knitted together in the breathy silence.
Harry remained still like an anticipating breath.
"It was always him, wasn't it?" His voice was still as soft as his touch, only it wasn't as warm anymore. Zayn looked blue, a broken blue trying to morph into a failed shade of warm. "I can't, Harry. You will regret it if we do something."
"I want you," Harry said again, nearing Zayn, tracing his face with his shaky palm. Zayn breathed slowly, his eyes shimmering with tears, and something inside Harry did not sit right. "Please."
"I love you."
A beat passed, then another. Three, four, five—
Zayn stumbled back, refusing to look at Harry. Harry's heart hurt because he hated himself for not feeling the same way, because he knew what it was like to be not loved back the way you wanted to be. And he loved Zayn, just not in the way Zayn loved him. So he walked closer to him, and Zayn did not protest. He wrapped his arms around the alpha, pulling him to his chest silently.
"I do love you," Harry mumbled against Zayn's hair as the alpha allowed the first sob. His chest tightened and he gulped, knowing what he was going to say. "I am sorry I couldn't love you the way you wanted me to."
