SINFULLY INLOVE. chenji

33

warning: this chapter may include brutality and violence and might be sensitive to others. 

jisung remained in the living room following what had occurred, spending the entire time sobbing on the couch. he put his elbow on his knees and gripped his hair firmly as he watched as tears started to form in his eyes once more.

he should've composed himself and held himself from shouting back at chenle. he knows how chenle feels so heavy, and yet, he did what makes everything worst. he never wanted this to happen. he needs to fix everything between him and chenle before they get separated from each other, he doesn't want chenle leaving with heavy feelings and misunderstandings between them. 

but after what happened, it is even possible to fix everything? 

uncontrollably crying, he began to shed big tears as he tightened his grasp on his thighs and bit his lower lip in an attempt to control his crying. he couldn't help but cry even more when he thought about certain things. everyone has left him, including his own family who never returned. jaemin and jeno are likely to do the same after they get married and start a family, and now, chenle will leave him and he's unsure if he's coming back or never. 

is fate just playing with him? is his happiness just temporary? will everything be dark and cold again after this? 

if so, he might as well kill himself. 

i mean, if no one's going to stay, then what's the point of living? what's the point of continuing living if no one's by his side to support him? and from whom does he live?

he covered his face with his hands and continued sobbing, but his cries lowers when he heard faint whines. he removed his hands from his face just to see the living cloud, sitting on the floor in front of him while whining softly. jisung stared at daegal for a while, and it seems like the dog's whine shows sadness. he quickly wiped his tears and carried the dog, placing it on his lap, "what is it daegal-ah?" he asked with a weak voice. 

the dog whined once again and jisung was about to ask the dog another question when he heard the bedroom door open, seconds after, chenle came down the stairs with his head hung low, his swollen eyes and reddish nose and cheeks are pretty noticeable and jisung couldn't help but worry. 

without saying a word or even giving jisung a glance, chenle hurried to the kitchen.

jisung placed daegal on the couch before following chenle to the kitchen. when he arrived in the kitchen, he saw chenle holding a glass of water. he doesn't want to scare the older, so before approaching him, "chenle..." he said softly. instead of a response, he received a cold shoulder. the younger cleared his throat before calling out his name again, "chenle," but this time, he slowly approached him. 

chenle slowly placed the glass on the sink, still not responding to jisung. he can feel the younger slowly getting closer to him and he suddenly couldn't move. "lele..." jisung whispered, he can feel himself crying again. "let's talk, let's fix this." he placed a hand on chenle's shoulder but the older faced him and softly pushed him away, "there's nothing to talk about."

chenle was about to leave but what jisung said made him stop walking away,

"but what about us?" jisung asked with a soft voice.

"there was no us, jisung," he replied, "there was no us in the first place," he replied coldly and emotionless. 

jisung began to cry once more as a result of what the older had said, "what do you mean? all of those things are just nothing for you?" he asked, grasping his hand. "please chenle, I know you didn't mean it. i know you didn't mean it, you were just being carried by your emotions."