The Break (An Eddie Munson Story)

Chapter 45: Harsher Words Never Spoken (2/3)

A/N: Sorry this is so late! I'm currently very ill, so writing is incredibly difficult for me right now. The words are scattered in my mind and will not form into coherent sentences.

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"Y/N, what..." Eddie stared from you to the bag that rested on the floor. The same bag you had brought with you, when you had been forced from your parental home. Judging by its slightly deflated appearance, you had only packed the essentials, knowing better this time what you would need, rather than what you wanted to take with you. "why are you packing a bag?" his mind was working overtime. You were leaving him, he suddenly felt incredibly powerless in the dynamic of the situation.

This was one of your worst nightmares come to life. You had wanted to slip away from the trailer, dragging behind you your earthly possessions and heartbreak. Without money for gas, you would have abandoned your car and it the road, letting your feet carry you to wherever they saw fit but instead, there you were, stood in from of your companion, unknowing in what to say, other than, "I'm sorry, Eddie."

"What is this?" he questioned, bewildered to the scene he had walked in on, unable to completely comprehend the fact that, you were trying to leave him. After everything you had been through together, to leave without a single explanation? Eddie was a storm of emotions, all swirling around and threatening to consume him whole.

"I just...I've got to go." you stated with a shrug, as you picked up your bag from the floor.

"Go? Hey, wait-" his tone was harsher than he would have liked, as he reached out to grab your wrist, his grip tight, almost painful. Try as you might, you coukd not conjure up enough fight within yourself to pull away. You tired. Oh, you were so tired. "What the fuck do you mean 'go'?" this was not anger, that laced his voice, this was devastation. "Is this about this morning?"

"Eddie-"

"No, don't 'Eddie' me. I want to know why the fuck you're running away, without even telling...me..." he anger trailed off, as he caught sight of the note you had written for him. A letter that was to be read in private, once you were miles away and unable to watch his reaction to your apology and ownership for all the hurt that had occurred in recent weeks.

"Eddie, don't." you begged him to drop the letter, even made an attempt to grapple for the paper but he held it too far from your reaching hands, as his eyes scanned the page. The words searing into his brain, as the guilt became insurmountable, forcing tears to his eyes.

"Fuck." the brunet cursed, once he had finished the final line, arm dropping to his side, as his shoulders sagged in shame. "I...is this true?" all the lies, he thought, all the lies that you had told yourself in explanation for his behaviour. So unnecessary and yet, they had manifested due to his inability to talk to you. Eddie had believed that, in concealing the truth of his knowing about the Upside Down, of your bravery and the monsters that sought to tear Hawkins to the ground- he would be saving you the pain and grief of recollecting a time, you evidently wished to forget. And yet, look where his lies had got him? You had internalised every nightmare, every panic attack and every depressive episode of his. Eddie Munson had not saved you, he had condemned you. "Y/N, is this how you feel?" but you would even look him in the eye, let alone provide him with an answer. "Y/N, talk to me."

"Howabout you start fucking talking, yeah?" he flinched at you sudden ferocity. You were not one who was quick to anger but you had finally reached your limit. "No, I'm serious. I-" wrenching your wrist from his grip, your expression fell from its previous snarl, to something more akin to despondency. "Fuck, Eddie. I...I don't even know how things ended up like this because you won't talk to me."

"Y/N..." it was just a whisper, a mere murmur of your name and yet, it tore your heart in two.

"I know," a sob fell from your lips but your refused his comfort, brushing away the hands that sought to wipe away your tears. "I know it must have been something I did because there's no other explanation for why you're suffering so much."