The Break (An Eddie Munson Story)

Chapter 62: And If I Only Could

A/N: I hope this is what you wanted.

Warning: Contains themes and mentions of violence, heartbreak and death.

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The petals fell from his fingers like scattered rain drops, as the brunet mindlessly repeated the phrase, "it will be okay, it won't be okay" in tandem with the small-scale destruction. So lost in his thoughts, Eddie failed to hear the tell-tale squeak of the back door opening and closing. He only became aware of your presence, when you tentatively greeted his turned away figure with a timid, "Hey." despite your caution, he still flinched at your unexpected presence. You grimaced in apology and with a nod towards the house, you offered an explanation for your invasion of privacy. "El said you were out here."

"Yeah, I, uh, just needed to get out of the house for a bit." his gaze dropped away from your own and back to the flower, which remained withered in his hand. A sad looking affair, after his anxious massacre. Without a second thought, the once beautiful corpse was discarded another the grass, to become one with the dirt once more.

Eddie had never let his mind linger much on the subject of death. It had never seemed like that big of a deal to him. His parents passing had only brought freedom from spite and venom. Horror movies were always just fiction to him. Nothing but actors playing a role that started and ended when the Director yelled "cut!". In Dungeons and Dragons, death only ever represented a failed of the players, that could be easily rectified which reincarnation or a trusty healing potion.

But ever since his learning of the Upside Down, Eddie's view on eternal oblivion had shifted to a more serious thought pattern. Not only did danger feel as if it lurked around every corner of the small Indiana town, the possibility of losing you prematurely was a harsh reality he was yet to full comprehend. It scared the shit out of him.

"How'd it go with the police?"

Your shrug converyed more to him than an words ever could- the weary lift of your shoulders, the huff of a sigh...it was not going to be the news he had been hoping for. "Okay, I guess. There's not really much they can do until they find that fucker."

"He's missing?"

You dropped down heavily beside him onto the grass lawn. All of the earlier adrenaline had since left your body. Now, you were just plain exhausted and grateful for the rest. "Absconded or something, they said." you mimicked what you were told by the officer. He guy had been friendly enough for a cop but he was no Hopper, that was for certain. Throughout the interview, you could tell Joyce had felt the same way. Just thinking about that good man being taken too soon, had tears welling up again in your eyes. Using even ounce of willpower you could muster, you held the emotion at bay. The last thing you wanted was to cry in front of Eddie right now. "Doubt he's still even in California."

"Fuck, I'm sorry."

"Why? You didn't do this to me."

"I know but still..." he had never wanted this for you, a life of violence. How could someone so brave manage to endure so much? You had faced interdimensional creatures and small town bullies, and still, the universe was hellbent on adding to your suffering. "You don't deserve this."

"I know." you agreed but you could swe the look of disbelief upon Eddie's features. You could not really blame him for being skeptical. There had not been many instances throughout your friendship, where you had not been convinced that, you were worthy of all the suffering the world threw at you. "Really, I do this time, Eds." you smile was strained but somewhat more convincing. "You doing okay?"

"I should be the one asking you that." he scoffed. "But yeah, I'm...I'm fine. Just glad you're...well..." it only took one look at the injuries to your body, for him to realise how close he had come to losing you again. "I'm glad you're here in one piece." the brunet's eyes trained espscially on the angry, inflamed cut that graced your lips. "Does it hurt?"