The Break (An Eddie Munson Story)

Chapter 48: Whisky Sips and Sleepless Nights

A/N: This is pretty much a word vomit but it is an update. So...

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The stub of a recently smoked cigarette, now extinguished beneath the heel of his boot, lay uselessly upon the ground, as he stood outside of your workplace, having been informed by Nancy and Robin of your secret employment. There was no malice felt towards you, as he glanced at the glass shop front, through which he could see the cash register and the sunny employee- your colleague- whom shared a warm smile with every customer whom crossed the threshold. They too, had greeted him with their pleasant disposition, as he had enquired after you. That same smile had not faltered, as they cheerily replied that you had promptly called them, the day after your argument, to hand in your resignation with immediate effect.

He had understood your hesitancy to tell him of your employment. Despite his reassurance that he could take care of you financially, you had worried about how burnt out he had become, yet the cause for the brunet's suffering had stramed from so much more than him doing his best to do right by you. You both had harboured secrets but it was Eddie's that had been the great undoing of your relationship and now, you had given up your newly acquired paycheck. It was a shame, he could truly picture you enjoying working in the store.

With you spirited away from town- or at least laying low from those who loved you- Eddie had no choice but to survive your departure. He went about his routine on autopilot, from attending class, answering his pager for drug drops, to minding Chrissy while she got high- the metal head did his best to keep his life on track.

During the day, he could convince himself to not think about you. To not let the town of Hawkins, with all it's ghosts, serve as a constant reminder of you. The daylight numbness was welcomed, as he avoided the diner and the videos tore. He absolutely refused to even drive past Lover's Lake, opting to take alternative routes, no matter how convoluted it made the journey. Even with his Uncle's occasional presence at the trailer, Eddie rarely spent much time within the four walls. Opting to study either in the school library or at Nancy's hotels. He wondered if she allowed him over the threshold out of guilt for what she had told him but he did not care, at least he could study in peace at the Wheeler's kitchen table. He was making vast improvements in calculations.

Had you stuck around, you would have been proud of him. But without you, Eddie had to remain proud in himself and hope one day, he would see you again and you too, would have thrived and found happiness without him.

The nighttime was more difficult to navigate. With most of Hawkins closed during the darkened hours and the now known threat of otherworldly beings, lurking in the shadows, Eddie was forced to not only remain within the trailer but also sleep without you being there to wake him up. The horrors that had plagued his dreams for so long, had evolved into something more gruesome. During previous slumber, the cursed unaware would present him the gift of things not see but learnt from your friends. Demogorgons, the Upside Down, the stench of blood- was all to be expected when Eddie closed his eyes but in recent days, all he dreamt of was you. Your smile, that gave way to blood pouring out from beneath your broken and bruised lips. Your laugh, which tranformed into a choked gurgle, as unseen creatures caught you in their vice-like grip and stole the precious oxygen from your lungs. The happy call of his name, that gained in panic, as you cried out for him to save you. He was always too late.

It had gotten so bad, that Eddie eventually caved and asked your friendship group for assistance, desperate to know how they- who had actually experienced the Upside Down- managed to get a full, uninterrupted eight hours.

The truth was, they did not. Not regularly at least. Daytime distractions were their saving grace but like Eddie, the night was more difficult to navigate. There had been one solution in the early days, that proven to be successful and that was a buddy system. Sleeping beside someone else, allowed each person to feel less vulnerable. Knowing someone was around to wake them up during a nightmare or be awake when danger came knocking, aided in a less disturbed slumber. Without you to pull him from his fearful visions, Eddie had to experience the full duration of the nightmares. Often waking afterwards tangled in his bedsheets and drenched in sweat, with your name dying on his lips, as he struggled to refrain from calling out for you...for your comfort, your undeserved love, for...for...

Never in a million years would Eddie have expected Steve to volunteer to be his buddy. In truth, Steve's opinion of the metal head had not changed. There was no mutual respect, only a bitter guilt, that fuelled his surprising decision. If Steve had just told Eddie to 'f*ck off', when he had asked for details on your experience with the supernatural, then the video store employee would not have been partly to blame for Eddie's trauma and your subsequent fleeing. There was no denying that Steve loathed Eddie for refusing to open up to you, before it was too late. If it had been him...but it had not been him. You had fallen in love with Eddie, not him. You might have cared about his wellbeing but you would never whisper, 'I love you', in the way that Steve craved to hear. Irregardless of what the brunet would have done differently, you had chosen to have your heart broken by another and that was something he needed to accept and ultimately, stop his useless pining.

So, instead, Steve moved out of his family home and into the trailer. It was strange, suddenly having the freedom away from his parent's watchful eye and yet, sharing a space with someone he utterly despised. It was both an absolution and a curse for his misdeeds. With only two bedrooms available in the mobile home, Steve had fully expected to take possession of the couch. However, much to his shock, Eddie had given up his own room, to make space for the ex-king of Hawkins High. The metal head could not stand to lay upon the same mattress, where you had once peacefully dozed beside him, as he worked through the remainder of his essay or, even more painfully, had tearily whispered those precious three words, after your run-in with Jason Carver. No, the couch would have to suffice.

When forced to remain in the cofines of the grave he had carved out for himself, through shere stubborn ignorance, Eddie spent his evenings drinking with Steve. They rarely talked, only occasionally sharing the odd pleasantries or only speaking when strictly necessary. Otherwise, the silence was filled with whatever distracting din they could conjure from the television. Infomercials, terrible B horror movies, the news- anything to fend off the awkward quiet. Beers in hand, they would sit on opposite ends of the sofa, until it was time for them to retire for the night.

Their would take place few hours later, when Eddie's screams filled the air, violently jolting Steve awake from his dreamless state. Like clockwork, he would clumsily exit the warm nest of duvet and one too many pillows, blearily tripping his own feet on route to the living room. It would be there, that Steve would stumble and eventually kneel before Eddie's writhing, tortured form and just as you had on many countless nights, Steve would coax Eddie awake. You had frequently been there for Steve in the early days of recovering from the first encounter with a Demogorgon. Having learnt his method of comforting from you, Steve knew exactly what to say, to carefully draw Eddie away from the nightmares and back towards reality. The aftermath of Eddie's awakening never became any less awkward. All macho 'thank you's and 'no problem's. Neither ever spoke of this ritual during the daylight hours. It would be another secret that would remain with them and them alone. But, as much as Eddie hated to admit it, having Steve around to pull him away from the nightmares, was way better than having to endure the full horrific vision, every time Eddie closed his eyes.

There had been one time, after one particularly bad night terror, that both Eddie and Steve had been so unsettled by the cries of terror, that had left the former's voice completely hoarse with overuse, that neither had been able to fake nonchalance and return, as they always did, back to their respective spaces, as if nothing out of the ordinary had occurred. Unable to sleep, they had raided Uncle Wayne's liquor cabinet and poured themselves a small glass of whiskey each. Replacing the missing liquid with water and hoping that he would not be able to tell the difference.

Their usual seating of choice upon the sofa had been abandoned, in favour of the hardwood floor, as they sat wearily and drank their bitter but warming drinks in utter silence. The television remained switched off. There was no call for infomercials, B horror movies or the news. As they took spaced sips from their mugs- there were no clean glasses available for use- there was only one thing on each of their minds, you. Unbeknownst to the other, Eddie and Steve were thinking about you, as they both yearned for your presence.

It was only when Eddie hsd broken the quiet spell with an emotion-filled, "I miss them", that Steve realised that, they had been momentarily bonded in their grieved recollection of you.

"Me too." he had eventually murmured, almost too quietly for the other brunet to hear, before he took another swig of his beverage.

The moment eventually passed and the boys got up, put the mugs in the overcrowded sink and went their separate ways.