The Trouble With The Truth

The Little Things

Three weeks after everything happened:

I rubbed Laurens back as her eyes fluttered, falling asleep. Emily was on a case and was going to be returning tomorrow. These past three weeks have been brutal. I've been closed off and I know it. I don't want to talk about what happened. Not yet.

"I love you sweet pea" I kissed her on the head before quietly leaving her room. I walked into our bedroom and sat in the bay window. The stars sparkled and it was in that moment that I started to cry. Uncontrollably. I didn't tell Emily what happened after the gunshots went off. I simply couldn't.

The sound of the floor boards creaking caused me to whip my attention towards the door, where I saw Emily. The moment she saw the look on my face I watched the concern and understanding wash over her eyes. All I did was look at her and I broke down even more. I buried my face in my hands. I was embarrassed. I felt tainted by a darkness now. The cushion shifted as Emily sat next to me. Gently she took my hands and pulled them from my face.

Her eyes had mine in a lock. All I could do was look at her. Desperate. Pleading. Though, I wasn't even all that sure what it was I was pleading for. After a few seconds I finally broke down and she pulled me into her arms. With my face buried into her shoulder, I sobbed, my tears drenching her purple sweater. She placed her hand on the back of my head, holding me closer.
In her arms, everything seemed to slowly start to mold back into place. How she manages to make me feel safe, brave, and loved all at once is beyond my comprehension. After five minutes or so of Emily and I holding each other I had composed myself enough to speak.

   "I-Im so sorry-"

   "hey hey" she whispered. "you don't ever have to apologize for feeling Y/n. Ever."

   "I thought I was never gonna see you again Em" my lip quivered as I just spoke those wretched words.

   "Honey..."
Glossy, her brown eyes starred into mine.

   "I was just so terrified of losing you and Lauren and I guess I realized this is the first time I've ever had something to lose."

   "Y/n, you can't lose me. And I promise you, Im not gonna let anything bad happen to you" she brushed a few strands of hair behind my ear.

   "I didn't mean to push you away" I whispered.

   "I know honey" she hugged me once more.

   "I love you Emily Prentiss"

   "I love you more Y/n Y/l/n"

I let out a small giggle and leaned closer to her lips before quite my saying,
   "I love you most"

   "Let's get you to bed" she kissed me and took my hand guiding me to our big cozy king.

   "Here" she helped me out of my shirt and took my favorite over sized tee of hers, putting it on me. "You look beautiful" she whispered. I couldn't help but swarm with butterflies just like it was our first date. I took my pants off and she tucked me under the covers. Once she changed and crawled into bed, she nuzzled towards me, wrapping her arms around my body.

      "You and Lauren are my world Y/n, you know that right?"

   "I know my love, you both are my world too"

    "I'll always be here. Always."
I turned around to face her and brushed her hair behind her ear. 

   "I don't know what I ever did to deserve you" my eyes watered.

   "Y/n, you deserve the world, and i promise I'll do my best to give that to you" Emily whispered.

   "That's not possible" I smirked as I continued to wipe my tears from my cheeks.

   "What do you mean?" her eyebrow raised in confusion.

   "You already have"
A small smile began to spread across Emily face.

   "I love you"
   "I love you"

I kissed her before snuggling into her arms, my eyes collapsing shut not a few moments later.

Following morning:

   "Mommy!"

I shot you in bed and glanced at the alarm clock. 6:45 am. Then, I noticed Emily wasn't beside me. I put in my robe and walked to Lauren's room where I found the two of them curled up in the rocking chair, Emily with a book in her hand.

   "I'm sorry, I hope we didn't wake you" Emily smiled.

   "No, no, not at all"

   "Mommy's doing the voices!" Lauren exclaimed.

   "She is huh?" I look at Emily with a widening grin.

   "She does it better than you"

   "Gee thanks" I let out a laugh and go sit next to them. We had been reading her charlotte's web. Lauren was an exceptionally bright child and was never out of ways to amaze us.

   "Mama can we make pancakes" she turned to me with a hopeful smile on her face

   "Of course honey" I kissed her forward. "I'll go get everything set up"

As I was setting up everything in the kitchen I felt a set of hands wrap around my waist as a hot kiss pressed against my neck.

"I love you" Emily whispered.

"Yeah?" I smirk before spinning around and pulling her closer to me. "That's such a coincidence because, I love you"

"I hope so, or I'd have a lot of questions" she chuckled.

"Lauren, honey, do you wanna make pancakes?" I called out.

Emily and I shared a gleeful smile as we listened to the patter of little feet running towards the kitchen.

"Yes!" Lauren giggled as she slid into the two of us, hugging our legs.

The three of us spent the morning making pancakes and having what Lauren considered a dance party, which, in reality was her jumping around spilling flour all over the place.

"Honey, it's Dave" Emily looked to me after she glanced at her phone. "Kai wants to play with Lauren at the Rossi 'mansion' this afternoon" she giggled.

I gave her a look of concern which quickly faded. I knew I couldn't live in fear forever. Besides, my monster was gone.

I nodded back to Emily.

"He'll pick Lauren up in a about a half hour"

"Tell him we'll come over too" i looked at Emily hopeful that she would be on board, and like always, she was on my side.

"You got it"

"We better get you dressed little miss" I scooped Lauren up and brought her to her room.

On our way Rossi's Emily drove and her hand rested on my thigh, making light circles with her thumb. She always made me feel so safe.

We stayed at Rossi's for three hours and by the time we left Lauren was exhausted.

   "She is gonna sleep good tonight" I whispered on the car ride back.

   "I really hope so..."

I watched a smirk creep across Emily's face as she gave me thigh I squeeze.

I knew exactly what she meant by that, and I couldn't wait.....