The Trouble With The Truth

Old Ghosts

*****TW!!!!: there is a mention/implication of sexual assault and a pregnancy termination******

Back to Y/n's POV:

"I trusted you" I whispered through my shaky voice.

"Y/n you can still trust me honey" she went to grab my arm and I pulled away.

"you come find me when you're ready to tell the truth." and I walked out, bumping into JJ.

"You ok" she asked

"Fuck you" I huffed as I blowed right past.

Tears were streaming down my cheeks as I rushed into the bathroom. I was not about to give either of them the satisfaction of breaking me enough to leave. I wiped the tears from my face and took a deep breath. I went to leave when the bathroom door swung open.

"Y/n, wait" Emily whispered as she locked the door. "Please just hear me out?"

"Under one condition," I said softly as the tears started to fall again. "I'll listen to you if you tell me the truth. Because if you don't I will find out and if I find out that you lied to me," each word I said I continued to cry even harder until she grabbed my face gently

"I don't lie. Especially not to you." her voice brought me indescribable comfort even though she was the reason I was in so much pain. She hoisted me up on the counter and stood in between my legs, her hands resting on my thighs.

"How could you?" I sobbed. "I-I don't even know what to say, I mean was everything you said just..what? to get me into bed?"

   "Honey, no! No! Just hold on a second, you haven't even given me an opportunity to speak." she said with stress in her voice. "I, JJ came into my office before I was about to leave and said that you had gone home with Alex."

   "Are you FUCKING kidding me! Please tell me you're joking!" I yelled, absolutely enraged.

   "I was in shock and I went and sat at my desk and just, I just cried. She came and gave me a hug until I pulled away and she leaned in. I swerved and told her off and said I had to go find you. That's when she told me that she lied about you leaving with Alex."

I stood there, eyes wide, mouth hanging open. Anger didn't even begin to describe how I felt.

"But, that isn't why I didn't come home last night." she muttered. "I want to first start by saying I'm sorry. I am so incredibly sorry, for acting that way toward you, I-I thought I was doing the right thing. I didn't mean a single word of it Y/n. Not one word."

I watched her fight back tears and I could feel the tension in my shoulders loosen.

"I was trying to protect you, which sounds kinda stupid, but you weren't safe if you were anywhere near me."

"Emily, what's going on?"

Her eyes were heavy and she had an almost ashamed look about her.

"Before the BAU, I was, I was undercover for the CIA in Scotland. There had been an abnormally high spike in drug trade, weapons, and people just started...disappearing."

Her voice was solemn and she could hardly maintain eye contact with me.

"I got extremely involved, like I was in the middle of everything and there were two girls who were in charge of the 'missing' people and the one girl, she had a brother who liked me for some reason and we.... we...." she struggled to say what she wanted to say.

"It's ok, Em" I whispered, growing more concerned.

"we got close." her voice shook. "it's not something I'm proud of, but I-I guess I just saw it as part of the job?" she finally let her eyes meet mine and they were filled to the brim with tears.

My face softened as I wiped her cheeks from the few tears that had escaped.

"He caught on, that I wasn't attracted to men when I refused to have sex with him..." she started to cry even harder. I could feel my heart breaking for her. It was torture to see her hurting like this.

"he, he wouldn't take no for an answer and I ended up pregnant" I broke down with her and pulled her into me. She sobbed into my shoulder and I just held her.

"I'm so sorry" she cried into my shirt.

"baby, look at me, don't you ever ever apologize for that. It wasn't your fault." my eyes glared into hers as aggressively caring as I could, wanting to make sure she knew that.

"That's when everything went to hell, I was pulled out and he ended up being shot in a crossfire between the cops and his sister." she paused again. "but, it didn't end there. His sister came after me and she wanted her 'brothers baby' but when she found out I had an abortion, her and her friend came after me."

She wiped her eyes and took a deep breath.

"We ended up catching them and they were in a maximum security prison somewhere in Belgium. However, I was notified yesterday that they somehow managed to get out and they were last seen boarding a plane to the states."

"You, you think they're looking for you?" I asked.

"No, I know they're looking for me." she looked at me with terrified eyes. I had never seen her truly scared.

"Ok, well lets talk to the team and I can go to the-" she cut me off quick.

"No. I don't want you anywhere near me or this case Y/n. I can't, I can't put you at risk like that." she said firmly.

"Emily, that's not your decisions to make. I'm not going to just sit off to the side and shrug my shoulders while my wife's fighting to protect her life!"

"you still wanna marry me?" she asked while tears rolled down her face.

"Of course, Emily. And quite honestly I don't care if you wanna marry me or not. If I don't have you, I-I don't have anything. You're all I've ever wanted." I whispered before pulling her face into mine.

"You could have told me. I would have understood, I could have helped" I whispered

"I, I just thought it was safer if you didn't know." she replied.

"Emily, you're stuck with me. I will do whatever you tell me to do. Except, leave you to do anything on your own. If there is one thing in this world you can count on, it's me." I held her face in my hands, terrified and relieved that our encounter yesterday wasn't 'real'.

"I love you Y/n. To the moon and back." she whispered as her forehead rested on mine.

"Together?" I asked.

"Always."

And then a banging on the door drew our attention.

"Hey, you guys gotta see this!" Morgan screamed from the other side of the door.

We gave each other a panicked look and ran out off the bathroom.

Running into the bullpen everyone had their eyes glued to the TV's.

Local police and volunteer firefighters are working to contain the fire from the explosion in what appears to be apartment 4B of the Westbrook apartment complex. We are still waiting on information as to whether or not anybody was inside.

The reporters words had both Emily and myself in shock. That was my apartment. It was still under my name even though I'd been living with Emily.

"They're here." Emily said under her breath.....