Justice or Destiny

Part_24

When I opened my eyes, I was on hospital bed surrounded with draperies. After asking the doctor what happened to me and how I reached here, he told me that someone found me unconscious into my car. That doctor was papa's friend and because papa was out of country he couldn't contact him. He didn't want me to leave but I didn't want to be there for any more second. After convincing him that he won't tell any one I left from there.

My whole body was still shaking so I went straight back at home. When mom was gone, I was completely broken. I did everything to get my mind off her lose. Then I saw Nandni. I started becoming a new person. I wanted to become a good person for her. But to her my existence never mattered. Then looking at her attraction towards Sameer, I realised I couldn't make myself enough good to deserve her. I started building a wall around me because I was afraid of getting lost into darkness again. I didn't want to be a person, I was before meeting her.

When I pulled Elina into my messed up life I tried to forget nandni and to move on. I thought one day those painful and heavy feelings around my heart to disappear but it didn't. I thought some day I would be happy into my own life without her but with every passing day, that emptiness was killing me.

Nandni was breaking those walls that took years to erect. When I had buried my every feeling, now she had found a way to enter. If keeping her around was bringing something so peaceful, then pushing her away was equally painful. She was becoming addiction and for selfish reasons I wasn't able to stop myself from going towards her again and again. There was a time when I was dying into my own darkness but she came like a ray of light. I thought if I lost her I will lose myself as well.

I got up and started being ready. She was going to marry a person who was much better than me. He will keep her happy. I wanted to see her for one last time. I wanted to see how was she looking into her bridal dress. I'm sure she must be looking, world's most beautiful bride ever. After reaching her home, many times I thought to go back. I struggled hard for not going to see her but at the end when all of them were busy in arrangements, I started finding the room where she was getting ready.

I looked around wildly, until I saw the source of my sleepless nights and fierce possession. In the last room at the end of corridor, I found her standing against the window. She was facing her back towards me. As I entered in her room, I saw suddenly her whole body got stiff. I could see visible change in her breaths. Suddenly those were fast and deep. Was she aware that it was me who just came inside.

Unknowingly I stopped really closer to her. I closed my eyes when her familiar scent filled my senses. Her dress was hugging her curves at every right place. Then I realised how breath taking she was looking. I know, I shouldn't have come here but I just wanted to have a last glimpse of what I couldn't have.

I didn't let her go because I wanted to sacrifice my love for my brother. No. Infect I kept myself away from her, for her own happiness. I remained away from her because she never liked me. It was sure, with me she wouldn't be loved the way she deserved. Isn't it better for her to live with the only person who makes her happy. Perhaps I was only capable of giving pain and tears.

"Damn...!" I cursed under my breath when suddenly I felt so possessive towards her. Without looking back she asked me angrily why I was here. I was speechless. My heart flip-flopped at the prospect of her question. I stood looking at her silently, until I gathered my nerves. This wasn't how I planned this visit. I was supposed to see her and then leave.

"I was missing you. Couldn't breath without seeing your one glimpse....!" I tried to put those words into sarcasm but she wasn't aware that in real that was the exactly my condition. At one hand I wanted to hate her, for getting married and at the other hand I was looking for her like a crazy lover. I was an entirely gone case.