|A L W A Y S & F O R E V E R| B O O K 1

20||M i s s i n g Y o u

Date: 8/29/15
Day of the Week: Saturday
Location: Los Angeles, California
Place: Ciara's Condo

Ciara
"So, how was your night?"

"My night was amazing. It would've been better if you were there, though."

"I know baby girl. I wish I could've been there."

"It's okay. I know you would have been here if you could have. I appreciate the flowers, Russ. They're beautiful, and you got some of my favorites."

"And what might those be?"

"Peonies." I smiled.

"Ah! I'm glad you liked them. It was the least I could do."

"So...when are you gonna have some time off to come visit me?" He heaved a sigh.

"About that...it's gonna be a while." I sat up in bed.

"How long of a while?"

"At least a month or two."

"What? Are you serious, Russ?" He ran his hand across his face.

"Russ...be for real. Really?" Sadness dripped from my voice.

"Yes, Ci. I know I promised I would fly out soon, but work-"

"I don't wanna hear it. Just change the subject."

"Ci, really? Come on now. We already talked about this before."

"Just change the subject," I repeated, not wanting my mood to get worse than it already was.

"Why are you acting like that, Ci? Don't do me like that. You know I have to work." I sat there silently, staring at him through the phone screen.

"I don't wanna argue, Ci. Please don't do this right now."

"Then when?!" He shook his head and ended the FaceTime call. I looked at my phone in disbelief.  I called him back, and he answered on the fourth ring.

"I know you didn't just hang that phone up in my fucking face!"

"If you keep it up, I'll hang up again!"

"Cool." He raised his brow.

"Cool? Okay, I'm not even going there with you."

"Going where with me?"

"Ciara, don't play dumb. It seems like we have this discussion every other week, and I'm tired of it. It's becoming mentally draining. You knew I was a busy man when you first met me, but you chose to be with me. And hear me out, I'm not trying to be rude when I say this. Sometimes, it seems like you don't know how to live your life without me being around. We can't just sit up playing house with each other all the time."

"So that's how you feel? Like we're playing house?" I was taken aback by his words.

"Ci listen. I'm not trying to upset you. All I'm trying to do is get you to see the bigger picture. It feels like you've been on my ass about me working and not spending enough time with you. That shit is tiring. Do you think it's easy for me to manage work and this relationship all the time? Yeah, I know I said we could make it work, but I also said it wouldn't be easy. And like I said, we just had this discussion a couple of weeks ago. I thought we agreed to focus on work more. What happened with that Ciara? That's what I'm doing, so what's the problem?" My eyes started to water a little as I bit my lip.

"You should be glad that I'm out here working and I'm not fucking you over. Half of this shit I'm doing now I'm doing for us. So later on down the line, we can have more time to spend together. I'm having problems with my business, and I'm trying to get this shit together! If I don't figure shit out, I could lose out on millions! I could lose my biggest investors, but you didn't even know that because I didn't tell you."

"I'm sorry." I hate it when he gets upset with me.

"We're supposed to work with each other, Ci. Remember?"

"I know, and I'm sorry." I put my head down and sniffled as I tried to wipe the tears that fell.

"I hate that I act this way. It's just so hard."

"It's hard for me too, babe." He sighed.

"I know it's hard for you, and I'm sorry for acting out like this. I'm sorry that I've been making you feel this way. I don't know why I'm like this-"

"Shhh, Ci. Calm down."

"I don't want you to be mad at me, and I don't wanna argue anymore. I'm always causing problems. I should be a better girlfriend ."

"Ci, you are-"

"Noo. I've been horrible, and I should be more understanding and supportive. You're always there for me. It's the least I can do." I sighed as I wiped more tears that rolled down my cheeks.

Russell
"Maybe us not seeing each other for two months is for the best." I agreed with her.

"I think so too. I think it'll not only give us time to focus on work but also add some discipline to our relationship. I know we can both agree that we started moving at a fast pace since the beginning." She nods her head in agreement.

"Yeah."

"Baby, I don't want you to hold this over your head."

"But I feel bad about the way I've been obliviously treating you lately. I disregarded your feelings, and I shouldn't have. No matter how many times I say I'm sorry, I can't can't say it enough."

"I know you didn't purposely react the way you did. You acted out on your emotions and that's understandable. I know how upset you are. Especially since I promised you. But I want you to be happy outside of our relationship. I want you to be happy with yourself. You live in California. There's so much more out there for you to do. Maybe you can pick up a couple of new skills or hobbies. Who knows? I don't want you to focus your whole being on me. You don't have the baby for the weekend. Hell! Have a girl's night, and go out and have fun. Go have a drink or something." I explained. She rested her head on her fist.

"You're right, and I'm sorry. I'm gonna make it up to you."