|A L W A Y S & F O R E V E R| B O O K 1

15||Y o u W h a t ?

Date: 8/18/15
Day of the Week: Tuesday
Location: Seattle, Washington
Place: Russ' Place

Russell
Telling Ciara about the loss of my unborn child was extremely hard. The hardest part was the fact that she aborted it. She didn't even tell me she was pregnant. The only reason I found out was because of the pregnancy tests. One day, after coming home from the gym and taking a shower, I found the empty box in the trash can. It's almost like she wanted me to find them. After asking her about them, she told me she wasn't pregnant and that they'd come back negative. When in reality, she was. A week later, she called me at one of my business meetings. There was something about her voice that threw me off. She didn't sound like her normal self. Her voice cracked as she told me we needed to talk. I thought something bad had happened, so of course I rushed home. Once I got through the door, she immediately told me she was sorry over and over again. But I couldn't comprehend what she was getting at. Then she just blurted it out. Told me she'd got an abortion and she no longer wanted to be with me. In a way, I blamed myself for the loss. I felt like I could have saved my child if I knew she was carrying it. If she didn't want it, I would have taken care of him or her by myself. It was a topic I never cared to talk about. After Ci told me about losing her daughter, that hit home. We both lost our child in different ways, and it brought us closer than we already were.
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We left Atlanta a week ago and currently, we're in Seattle for the week. My vacation break was over, and I had business meetings on top of business meetings. Ciara and Zahir still came along, although I would barely be at home.

"Bye, baby girl. I'll see you later." I gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. Zahir reached out to me while whining.

"Aah, I have to go lil' man. I'll see you later, though." I kissed his forehead before rubbing his curly hair, making him break out into a smile. I swear, I love this little boy so much.

"Give me a call when you get ready to leave the firm."

"I'll be sure to."

"Alright. Have a good day at work." She smiled, blowing me a kiss.
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When I pulled up to the building, I checked my tie before grabbing my briefcase from the passenger seat. I stepped out of the car and walked up to the building. Once I got in, I said good morning to a few people before making my way to the nearest elevator. I pressed the button for the tenth floor and waited for it to stop. When it finally did, I got off and made my way to the conference room. I pulled out my phone to check a few emails before taking the files from my briefcase and finishing up some work. In the midst, I heard the door opening. In walked the COO, Jeremy Michael. He was always early and always on top of his A-game.

"Morning Mr. Michael. I see you're here extra early per usual." He took a seat next to me at the head of the table.

"Good morning. I was just finishing up some work."

"I see. You take your job very seriously, don't you?"

"Of course I do. I love my job." I give him a head nod.

"There's something I've been needing to talk to you about." He put the files back in his briefcase, turning his full attention to me. Before I got the chance, one of my workers walked in.

"I'll talk to you about it later. Meet me in my office after the meeting's over."
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It was after midnight when I got home from the firm. I knew Ci would be asleep by now, so I didn't bother calling her. As expected, she was lying asleep on the couch. I smiled to myself and put my briefcase down on the coffee table. I reached under her neck and legs, picking her up and carrying her bridal style to my bedroom. After untucking the covers and laying her down, I pulled them back over her before making my way to the bathroom. I shed my work clothes and put them in the hamper before stepping into the shower and turning the hot water on. When I finished, I dried off, brushed my teeth, and put on the pair of boxers and a T-shirt that I left in the bathroom. I got in bed next to Ciara, snuggling my head into the crook of her neck while wrapping my hands around her small waist.

"Why didn't you call me?" Her voice came out groggy.

"Because you were asleep."

"I still would've answered."

"I know you would."

"So why didn't you call?"

"I didn't want to wake you. Go back to sleep."

"Shut up. You don't tell me what to do." I chuckled as I wrapped my arms around her waist tighter. Before I knew it, those three words slipped from the tip of my tongue.

"I love you." I felt her body grow tense against my chest.

"You what?" She removed my hands from her waist and slowly sat up against the headboard.

"I said, I love you." She put her head down and started fumbling with her fingers.

"You don't have to say it back. It may be too soon for you, but I just wanted to get it off my chest." I could tell she was at a loss for words.

"I-I don't know what to say." She stuttered over her words.

"You don't have to say anything. I respect that."

"It's not that-" I cut her off.

"It's okay, Ci. I'm not trying to rush things. I know you want to take things slow, but I couldn't hold it in much longer." The moonlight that shined through the window beamed against her face, causing it to glow. I reached out to caress the smoothness of the skin of her cheek. She gave me a small smile.

"How was work?" She asked, changing the subject.

"Great, actually. I gave one of my workers a promotion."

"Well, that was nice of you." She lay on her left side before resting her head against her fist.

"It's all business, baby girl. I do what I have to do. It has nothing to do with being nice."

"Quit tryna act tough. You and I both know you're one of the sweetest souls on Earth." She reached out with her right hand, caressing my cheek with her thumb.

"That's not what everybody thinks at the firm." They all thought I was an asshole. She rolled her eyes.

"They think I'm an asshole."

"That's what they're supposed to think. You're their boss. Anyways, what did he get promoted to?" She turned over on her stomach, resting her chin on her fists. I loved how she was so engaged in what I do for a living. My ex-wife didn't give a crap about what I did as long as she was getting my money and sitting up pretty.

"He got the new position as the CFO." Her face turned up in confusion.

"What's that?"

"A CFO's job is to oversee the financial activities of the company."

"Elaborate." I chuckled. This woman.

"They sign checks, monitor the cash that's coming into the company, and they're in charge of the financial planning."

"Oooh. And what do you do?"

"You know what I do." She giggled.

"You're the boss."

"Exactly. Now go back to bed, girl. I'm tired as hell, and you know I have to wake up early in the morning." I turned the lamp off next to my bedside and laid down, pulling the covers over me and closing my eyes. A few minutes later, I felt something in my ear. It was no other than Ci. She's always playing around with me while I'm trying to sleep.

"I'm gonna make you go to one of those guest rooms if you don't stop." She giggled before I felt her body on my chest. She wrapped her arms around my waist.

"I love you." I heard her say, but I didn't say anything. I just smiled to myself instead.