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kai watched the screen of his phone go black as he set it down beside him. he didn't realize he'd been smiling the entire time he was texting y/n, though he knew he liked the feeling. he was in the dorm's common room sitting in the dark, the only bit of light coming from the moon through the windows.
he grabbed the blanket next to him and quickly threw it over himself. he nuzzled into it as he felt his face and chest warm up at his continuing thoughts of y/n.
his smile soon began to fall, more suffocating thoughts entering his mind. now that he knew he liked y/n, he was a little scared. what if his feelings ruined things? what if their connection was all in his head and y/n doesn't feel the same? but what if he did feel the same and their jobs get complicated?
he frowned and closed his eyes, wanting to pull the entire blanket over himself and just hide.
"why is this so hard.." he whispered to himself right as soobin emerged from his room and heard his group mate's struggle.
"what's wrong?"
kai jumped at the intrusion of his voice, making soobin show a sheepish smile and sit next to him.
"my bad, didn't mean to scare you.. what's going on?" he asked softly. kai looked at him for a minute before turning away and shaking his head. soobin frowned.
"well, if you don't wanna talk that's fine, but i'm here if you need anything." he said with a small pat on the male's shoulder. kai watched him start to get up from the sofa, unsure of what to do. however, this was soobin. kai knew he could trust him and he would always be supportive. he closed his eyes again and decided to just say it.
".. i like y/n." he blurted out. soobin turned back and looked at him, a little surprised.
"you mean.. ?"
kai nodded as he hid his face again. soobin took a deep breath and sat back down.
"wow, um.. so, are you.. gay?" he asked, his voice remaining as gentle as he could manage. kai set the blanket down on his lap, now showing his distressed face.
"i don't know.. i don't think i'm ready to put a label on myself yet. i just know i like him.. a lot."
soobin nodded and rubbed his back comfortingly. he didn't like seeing him so upset, but he knew he couldn't do much other than just be here for him.
"well, what are you gonna do?"
kai sighed and shook his head as he looked down at his fidgeting fingers.
"i think he might feel the same, and i wanna just confess, but.. so many things could go wrong. if he doesn't feel the same i don't want things to be ruined. and if he does.. our jobs could get a lot harder. and i don't wanna mess up anything for the group, and-"
"hey." soobin interrupted, his voice more firm now. "you could never 'mess up' things for txt for something like this. whatever happens, we'll all figure it out together. you focus on what feels right. if you think he likes you too, then trust your gut. you should go for it."
kai finally looked at him, a small smile on his face now as he nodded. soobin returned the smile and ruffled his hair fondly before getting up and returning to his earlier task. kai let out a long exhale, sitting back. he didn't know if he was brave enough to confess yet, but the idea was definitely concreted into his mind now.
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YOU ARE READING
found ( h.kai x male reader ) ✓
Fanfiction⠀"i found a part of myself that i didn't know existed." ⠀ ⠀ ⠀book I ⠀huening kai x male!reader ⠀instagram au ️⠀©gothkyu