First Love's Secret

chapter 12

Life now is at peace and comforting as can be; "I hope all is well here, my dear" Simon was standing by my side watching Bea playing with other kids at the square. I wanted to agree with what Simon had just said, but sometimes there is something always bugging inside me, it was the feeling I had when Drew brought me to the hospital, it was a puzzle that keeps on haunting me.

      "Absolutely, there is nothing in this world that I would like to trade my life now with" I lied. He sigh, "Keep it up Carrie" I arched an eyebrow at him, "the lying" and then he went away to check a text message from his iPhone, and to which he left me with my mind hanging.

      Simon came back rushing and looked so shocked, "Carrie! Have you checked your phone?" I shake my head remembering I left it battery empty at my room earlier this morning. "We better go" I was taken aback, I gathered our picnic basket and get Bea then we head home.

      I almost got myself dead from not breathing and out of shock when I heard the news that Jazz' plane was found crashed somewhere in an island but his body was nowhere to be found. The head of aviary police told us that Jazz was with two other pilots that night, they were caught by a storm while on a mission. Jazz committed himself in an aviary search and rescue team, it was really his nature to help; he was a very compassionate man.

      Our family was in deep sorrow, but we were enlightened by the news that Jazz was found, his body was found floating somewhere near the crashed plane. I lose him, how can this be happening, my prince charming left me. My friends were there to support me and to help me cope up with Jazz' death. Sleepless, tearful nights which I had these past few days, I lay awake at night hoping and thinking that someday my prince will come back, here with me, laying here by my side. But soon enough, reality comes rushing in me, he will be no longer here with me, not for a couple of months nor years but forever.

      I know it will be a hard time for me to accept this, this will be the end. "Dear you might not expect this" Simon whispered in my ear, I looked at his gazed, and there she was Jazz' mom, immaculate as ever. I saw the pain in her when she approached Jazz' coffin, she wept even if she tried so hard to hide it, I know she does because for so long I have been battling with his mom's pride.

      I look at her sad eyes, full of pain but with excitement to see her only son again. Jazz' mom doesn't like me to be her son's wife, she expected more and even more than her standard, I doubt she would like to have goddesses as her in-law. Still staring at her and captivating every moment, she caught me. My eyes were shock, why did she look at me? For the very first time she glares at me. I tried to smile at her but I can't even move my lips, that's what this evil witch casted on me, she always makes me freeze, cold as ice giving me Goosebumps in every inch of my body. That's my dearest monster in law.

      I wanted to talk to her, but she immediately left, she didn't even give a word to me, oh Jazz how will this end? When she left, all eyes were staring at me, while their mouths busy whispering at each other, talking about her, me, and to what just happened.

At Jazz' funeral, it was the most painful farewell I have ever had. Looking at his coffin being pulled down six feet from the ground, I bid him goodbye. Jazz' family was there too, my mom-ster in law, Jazz lil' Sister Catherine and Catherine's spouse, it was like a little reunion for Jazz, for all of us and I hope I do belong.

      "Bea?" she was no longer by my side, I look for her and found her happily talking with Catherine and Jazz' mom. Suddenly, I felt that prickly pain inside my heart, it was guilt. How is it they are very close to Bea, like a connection of same blood bond? How can that be possible if Bea's not even the real daughter of Jazz? Then tears started falling from my eyes, rolling down my cheeks, I hurriedly wipe it off when Kath and Simon approached me.

      "Look at dear Bea, being loved and owned by Jazz' family" Simon blurted, Kath looked at me,"hey, are you okay? Are those tears?" I step back and hides my face "no, no I'm okay...It's just mourn." I lied. How many times do I have to lie? To my friends, to Jazz, to Bea, to Mrs. Benson and family...then I remembered him, Drew, the father of my child. I burst into tears and then run to my car, but suddenly out of my peripheral view I caught something, there was this man standing from afar beside a tree, like he was hiding from us. Wearing all-black, he kept himself undistinguished, but there is something inside me telling that he's somehow very familiar, I closed my eyes to remember but when I opened it, he was gone.