Ch. 45 A Little Progress

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Ratchet’s P.O.V.
What Crosshairs is telling me isn’t good. This could be a sign of something more serious or part of the kidney infection. The challenge is getting Jamie to give me a urine sample. She’s already embarrassed about everything else going on with her health. We can try a catheter a little after Jamie has a drink. Crosshairs also asks about speech therapy for Jamie. I’m not sure if we’ll get results from trying to get her to engage in conversation if she won’t even answer Sunstreaker when he asks what color they should use while doing art together. I can’t say for sure if this is how our friend will be or if there’s still a long road ahead. I give Crosshairs a single-use catheter and leave the medbay. 

Crosshairs’ P.O.V.
Drift will not like this, even if it’s nothing new we have to deal with. I’m letting him sleep while I tube-feed Jamie. I put the speaking valve on, hoping she’ll talk. She looks at Drift, which worries me. Even if she doesn’t know how much time has passed, she’s always afraid we’ll leave her. She knows how much we worry about her and there’s a lot of work to do for her care and recovery. 

After I finish taking care of her, I sit on the recliner holding Jamie. She keeps looking at Drift. I try to comfort her, but Jamie cries. I can’t believe how quickly Drift woke up and took her from me. The way she’s holding on to him says it all. One of those days again.
“Come on, I think a bath helps relax you.”
Drift goes into the bathroom. I rush to get some clothes for both of them. I doubt Drift goes in the tub with her, but now he doesn’t have to go up to our room to get clothes.

Drift’s P.O.V.
I don’t know what to think about Jamie holding on to me. It’s not the first time, but while she needs so much care, I worry about what she’s thinking. 
It’s funny watching Crosshairs open the door a little and, without looking, place a pile of clothes on the bathroom floor. I notice he put the oximeter on the pile.
“Do you want to oxygen concentrator?” He asks.
“Better to be safe and slid it in here.”
Crosshairs also slid  the suctioning machine along with the oxygen concentrator into the room.
“She’s not nude yet,” I tell him, knowing he’s worried.
Crosshairs comes in and sits on the floor next to me.
“Jamie, you know how much we love you,” I remind her, “we’ll never leave you. You’ll recover.”
She didn’t think I’d kiss her. Crosshairs smiles, seeing her shocked expression. He plays along but on the cheek before leaving.

I put the oximeter on Jamie’s finger before running the water. Her oxygen level is a good 97%. I undress Jamie, do what I need to cover the feeding tube and protect the trach from water, and put Jamie in the tub that’s too small for both of us to get in. The bath relaxes Jamie but also has her seeing her boney body.
“I have an idea; pancakes and bacon for breakfast,” I suggest. I knew I’d likely only get a smile, “I don’t understand why you don’t want to talk. I don’t want to take the trach out if you are going to struggle without it. You know there’s a protocol to follow.”

After a relaxing half-hour bath. I text Crosshairs about breakfast and take care of Jamie, including seeing if she’s been needing to urinate and getting a sample for Ratchet. Hoping there’s nothing else going on. It’s probably too soon to think Jamie will no longer need to be on oxygen except for when she’s asleep and can use the toilet. I notice the cathetor on the pile of clothes. I know Ratchet  gave Crosshairs this.
I luck out and get what I need for Ratchet before dressing Jamie.

After I give Ratchet the catheter tube, I start an antibiotics infusion and sit on the recliner with Jamie wrapped in her red blanket. I don’t know what to do, but I don’t like how she doesn’t want to talk.

We’re happy Jamie is eating breakfast. I know Crosshairs tube-fed her already and she hasn’t been feeling like eating for the past couple of days.
“Oh, Sideswipe wants to know if you want to play video games with him, if Ratchet will yet you,” Crosshairs says.
“Yes,” Jamie says, quietly.
Crosshairs and I smile like happy parents hearing their sparkling say their first word, but I worry she feels forced to talk after what I told her, which is not good.
We enjoy our breakfast, still happy to see Jamie eating a lot before Crosshairs goes to take care of the dishes and talk to Ratchet.
“Jamie, I know I said you need to talk for the trach to be removed, but I don’t want you to feel forced.”
She leans on me and fixes the blanket. 
Crosshairs comes back, informing us that Ratchet is allowing Jamie to spend time with Sideswipe. We know Sunstreaker will be there. I worry about how fragile Jamie is, but let her walk to the lounge room.

The twins smile seeing Jamie walk into the lounge room, knowing how frail Jamie is and how careful we are.
Crosshairs takes me out of the room once Jamie is occupied.

“What’s with you?” Crosshairs asks, “I thought you’d be happy Jamie said something and is doing well keeping her oxygen level up.”
“After I told her she needs to talk to make sure she can keep her oxygen level up. I know one word isn’t enough to know and she might not talk like she needs to—.”
Crosshairs hugs me, “I know, it’s hard to see Jamie like this, not knowing what’s going through her mind. Thinking what if our little lady can’t recover? I hope she’ll keep talking.”
“Did you tell them?”
“No, they’ll love the surprise when she’s ready to talk to anybot.”

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