A Thousand Years | Bloom x Valtor

Bonus Chapter

Bloom
"One for every year you lived." I whisper to my youngest rose which smells the best out of all thousand that I planted. I planted a thousand roses and they all grew and bloomed. They won't bring him back or make me feel better but they live for him. At least I feel like he's by my side when I look at them and the place smells beautiful.

I put the watering can aside and stand up straight again. The roses give a beautiful view that reminds me of The Little Price.

Valtor was my rose.
Or I was his.
I don't know.
Maybe I was his fox or he was mine.

I take a deep breath, ignoring the fact that I still feel like I can't breathe since no amount of oxygen will be enough to put down the fire in my lungs. It only makes it worse and one day I really wont be able to breathe at all.

"Bloom! My love, we told you to not overwork yourself." Daphne's voice reaches me sooner than herself. I sigh before I admire her beautiful look and outfit of the day. Sometimes it's still weird to see her like this. To really see her. To be able to feel her. She's out of flesh, bones and blood like we are. It took a while to get used to that but I love it.
"I'm watering roses. You can't call that work." I tell her, smiling and walking to one of the benches on the raised platform in the garden.

My mother told me that this was her favourite spot back then because she always met my father here. They met here secretly many times before they got married. It's like a little hideaway. A lovely hideaway with flowers, trees and a beautiful view. With unforgettable memories.

"I can do that for you." She says as we sit down next to each other. "I'm pregnant, not sick." I tell her and laugh it off. She places her hands on my round belly which is getting bigger and bigger with every day.

It has been seven months since I lost Valtor. Since I killed him. And it has been six months since I know that I'm pregnant.
After everything that happened I got sick. So sick that I barely left my bed or the palace. It made everyone worry, especially since I should've been happy to finally have my kingdom, my family and my home. The folks of Domino celebrated the resurrection for two weeks. I stayed behind closed doors and in the third month I got myself back together. Enough to plant roses, take walks, enjoy every meal with my family and even visit some places in Domino. I had to. Everyone was stunned and happy to see me. It felt amazing and exciting to be a princess to these people. Now I finally know how it feels to be at the right spot. I don't feel lost anymore but I feel something missing.
Now that my belly is getting bigger, I avoid going outside. I don't want the people to talk. They already know but I don't want to shove it in their faces. Here I'd have to be married to have a child. It's nobodies business but I don't want to have to explain the situation. I'm not ashamed of who the father is but what I have done to him.

I got sick because of regret and guilt. I loved him and I decided to take his life without hearing him out or considering forgiveness. My disappointment was so big that I wanted him gone. Now that I think about it, I know it was all my fault. From the second he told me the truth, I should've known. I should've understood. I was mad at him for not telling me earlier when he was right. If I would've found out earlier, I would've killed him too because I'm a bad person. Deep inside me there's something so dark and disgusting and it's bigger than anything else inside me. Bigger than all the good and positive I have. Nothing will ever make me forgive myself. I did something that can't be changed and now I will have to raise our child alone. One day I will have to tell it the truth about what I did and why it doesn't have a father.

"Are you sure that you don't want to find out the gender?" She asks, sadness all over her face. I shrug. All she wants is throw a gender reveal party but I don't want that. "Yes." I answer. Without Valtor all of this will stay half done.