Forbidden Love

Chapter 21

The next morning i woke up on the floor...He left...he actually left..what did i do...I said to myself as i continued to cry "maybe i was too harsh...i have to fix this..." I sniffed before getting up and putting myslef together,I wore a black dress then My maid came in " sultana.." i turned to her " Take care of Mehmed for me..im going down to city.." I said as i put on hijab to cover my face she nodded before leaving the room and i left the palace. I walked to the city since i needed to think what to sat to Malko..i knew where to go..i knew where he was..he was at his good friends house Matrakci Nasuh Efendi, he was also Ibrahims friend wich makes him my father friend as well but we stopped seeing him after my father killed Ibrahim.

 After half an hour i finally got to the city and made my way to Matrakcis house, when i got there i took a deep breath and knocked on the door, after awhile the door opened revealing Matrakci himself, i know i shouldt be doing this...its forbidden but i have to "Hello? how can I help you?" he asked confused and i sighed " its me Nasuh" i said softly before removing my hijab from my face and his eyes wide open "Sultana" he bowed "Is Malko here.." i asked " he is not-" " Nasuh! i know he is just let me in, i need to talk to him" i said getting annoyed " But my Sultana.." "please.."  He sighed before moving away so i can enter, i smiled at him before entering the house, he led me upstairs where i saw Malko eating and talking with a women, my heart dropped cuz i knew exactly who it was "Malko.." they both looked at me and his smile imidietly dropped, I looked at the women sitting with him..she is beautifull..."Leave us alone woman now" I told her and she just laughed it off " and who are you to tell me that ?" she said arogantly "somone who can chop your head off if you dont behave " i told her coldly and she walked over to me " yeah right.." she looked at me up and down and i removed my hijab, her eyes wide open and she kneeled down " im sorry sulatan! please forgive be" she cried and lift her up by her hair " leave " I let her go and she ran out of the room, i turned to Malko and he got up " we need to talk" i said and he nodded, we sat down by the table and Nasuh brough us tea and left.  We sat there in silence for awhile before he said " Im sorry for doing this to you Hieren.." I looked at him "i know its wrong and i feel realy sorry " he looked down and i sighed " why did you do it then..." I looked down and he sighed " becuse..i needed love and affection..we have been married for almost a year now and youre acting like we are just friends..i tried so hard to make you fall in love with me but it was usless becuse you just dont want to and that hurts me" " so you kidnapped a girl...and made her fall in love with you?" I asked " yes i did and she dont want to leave me, she loves me and im planning on having family with her Hieren.." I looked at him with tears in my eyes " Malko you are married to me, youre acting like a little kid, you cant just cheat on me like its nothing! If my father hears about this he will chop your head off!  and you know it very well!" I yelled but callmed myself down " thats why you wont tell him anything" he said before taking my hand in his and kissing it " please Hieren i really love her " I looked at him not beliveing words that just came out of his mouth " Youre crazy..." I whispered "please " He suddenly kneeled down and i tought..its true...i cant fall in love with him..i tried but i just cant...and he does not love me anymore..if they really love each other i guess its the right thing to do..." Fine...but you cant live here you have to come back to palace and you have son if you maybe forgot that also needs a father.." I said to him and he looked up at me with smile " ill come back to our home and live there but i will come here every day after work and come home at night.." I nodded before getting up " fine.." I put my hijab back on, i smiled at him before leaving.  On my way home i tought to myself if i did good thing..i mean every love should be supported...but then again..he made a sin that cant be forgiven...I came home and was welcomed by the sound of baby crying, I took off my hijab and walked to the maid room and saw Nasia trying to calm the baby down " Give him to me" She nodded and handed me my son over and i smiled when he stopped crying " Hello my darling" I gave him small peck on his forehead and walked to my chamber, I gently rocked him for few minutes before he fell asleep and then i gently placed him in his little crib, I then sat on my bed and watched him sleep before my maid came in the chamber and bowed " Sultana..Mihirmah sultanan came to see you" I was obviously shocked when i heard that "Tell her to wait in main chamber" she nodded and left the room.  After changing into more comftrble dress i went to main chamber and saw Mihirmah sitting on sofa, I smiled at her and she did the same " Hello sister"  I told her before sitting down with her on the sofa " hello Hieren, i came here to ckeck on you and the baby" i nodded " thats very nice of you "i smiled at her and we talked for awhile " i think its time for me to go..Rustem is probobbly waiting for me at home" She said and i nodded, we said goodbye to each other and she left.  Night came fast after that, I got ready for sleep and to feed my son, I layed with him on bed and started feeding him while watching his little face " you are so cute" i said to him before kissing his forhead and softly cuddling him to sleep, then we hear door opening and revealing Malko, he smiled at both of us but i just watched Mehmed eat, i couldnt pretend like nothing happened..and he was crazy if he did, he wore his night clothes and layed next to me " are you still mad at me...." he asked " how can you even ask me that Malko...are you serious?" i looked at him in disbelive " i know its hard for you but" i cut him off " Can we just not talk about this please..." i asked and he nodded and turned to sleep, I called maid so she can take Mehmed and put him to sleep then i fell asleep as well.

The next morning came and Malko already left, I got up from my bed and put on pink dress , i checked myself in the mirror before going to the main chamber where maid were already waiting for me and preparing me tea "good morning sultana " All the maids said and i just smiled and sat down on the sofa " I put honey in todays tea sultana, just to make sure you dont get sick, its very cold outside" one of the maid said and i nodded " you can go" I said and all of them left  but i stopped one from doing so " Firuze come here" i said and she came " bring my son here please along with his crib, i want him to be here"  " but sutana he is sleeping" she said scared of my reaction " after he wakes up then" she nodded and left. After about few hours she brought Mehmed to the main chamber with me i ate my breakfast while he was in the crib and then Nasia came in " Sultana, his Majesty came here" I wide opened my eyes and smiled " let him in" I got up and after few moments he came in " Father!" I said exited before rushing to him and hugging him, he of course hugged me back " My darling, how are you" he asked returning my smile "im great father, im praying for your health" i said and we sat in the sofa " is Malko treating you right?" He asked and i went silent for  a moment " um yeah he is! he is wonderfull" " thats great then" he said and i nodded " how is searching for my mother going..." i asked and he sighed " Hieren.." " father you cant just stop searching for her..." " we searched for her for long long tme and you know it...its like she vanished " he said frustrated " that doesnt matter.." we both went silent for few minutes before my father broke the silence by saying " i came here to give you happy news..Your brother will became father soon" he smiled and looked at me, i smiled " wich one? Selim?" he shook his head " Mustafa" my smile dropped.