A Struggle Within Itself

Chapter 34

Genniffer's Pov

Last time I was in this position I was completely on cloud nine. But this time I felt self-loathing. How could I be so stupid?

Last night after opening the window. Jaylen stood outside of it. He begged me to come outside so we could 'talk it out.' I did. We walked the block and just talked and argued. Eventually it got too cold to be walking and he invited me back to his house and now here I am.

I laid totally naked under Jaylen's body. His warm chest pressed against mine and the rest of his body held me down. I needed to leave. It was a mistake for me to even leave the house. I tried to wiggle from under Jaylen's body and ended up falling on the floor. Jaylen woke up and looked around. I swiftly grabbed a cover from his bed and wrapped it around myself and stood up.

"Where are you going?" Jaylen mumbled in a sleepy voice.

"Leaving" I said softly. He sat up, threw the covers off his bed.

"Why?"

"Because it was a mistake. This was a mistake." I looked around for my things and started to pick them up.

"Wait a minute" Jaylen grabbed my hand. "I thought this was like a get-back-together thing. To forgive and forget what happened. Like make-up sex." Jaylen stood up and his junk hung out. I snatched my hand back and used it to block my eyes from seeing and looked away.

"No, it's not like that. Please I just want to go." I put on my shirt and looked for my pants.

"So wait this was your way of playing me?"

"No its not like that Jaylen. I just can't do this." Jaylen sat in silence while I walked around looking for my stuff. He looked on the other side of his bed and grabbed my pants and threw them at me.

"Here" he said coldly. He sat back down on his bed and put his hands together. He hunched his back over and stared off into thin air. I finished putting my clothes on and put on my jacket. I turned around to Jaylen.

"Okay let me out." I shrugged. His eyes looked up at me. He stayed there for a moment and then got up. He went over to his dresser and put some underwear on. He walked me downstairs and to the door. I stepped out and he slammed the door behind me. The slamming of the door was like a wave of Jaylen's anger and it made my eyes water. But it was like the cold winter air wouldn't let a tear drop from my eyes onto its beautiful white snow. I walked through the yard of the house that was placed between me and Jaylen's and climbed into my bed.

I woke back up in the afternoon. My stomach growled so I went downstairs to get something to eat. I checked the fridge and it was a complete ghost town in there. I closed the fridge and saw a note on the door.

Went to get some groceries
Love, Mom

I rolled my eyes and crumbled up the news paper. Since there was no food in the house I guess I will have to go out to get something to eat. I traveled back up stairs and climbed back into bed. I grabbed my phone and texted Aqua to come to my house so we could go out to eat. She messaged back minutes later and agreed. I drifted back off to sleep waiting for her to come.

I woke up the second time today and heard a banging at the front door. I scratcued my head and then became shocked when I realized that it was Aqua knocking. I ran all over my room so I could throw something on. I grabbed a white beanie and put on my head and stuffed all my hair in it. Next I grabbed a black cardigan sweater some pants. I went downstairs and opened the door.

"Damn Genniffer it's about time! What do you be doing before you answer the door. Your hat is cute though." Aqua yelled. She walked in with Brian and Jaylen close behind her. I cut my eyes at Jaylen and grabbed Aqua's pulled Aqua aside.