The Mortal Instruments | Morgenstern Blood

Understood:

"I know exactly how it feels, sister. I am that brother. I am Sebastian Morgenstern and I am going to burn down the world."

Clary's POV-

His expression changes as he speaks. His eyes clear and he grins. His grin was such an opposite to his words that it seemed almost morbid.

It was obvious he knew what I meant. He already knows what it feels like to lose a father, and he will too lose the mother he never cared for, or who never cared for him. I feel a pang of sympathy for Sebastian. He said the words so bitterly, with so much hatred.

I never understood until now that he hates the world. He wants to burn it down for what it's done to him. He hates it for that. And Sebastian Morgenstern will not be beaten by the world. In some ways that makes what he wants to do better, but not okay.

"I don't want to hate you..." I try to tell him, to give him some morsel of how I feel.

"Then don't."

"If you do this I will!"

"By the angel Clary, see reason!"

I sigh and there's a long pause which follows.

"Jonathan-

"I'm not ca-"

"There's some Jonathan in there. I like him. I'd like to see him more. Jonathan please..."

"Hold your tongue, sister."

I can see him tense. His hand bunches into a fist and the veins on his hand stick out. I don't know why I push him but I do.

"Don't order me-"

His hand flies up and despite my training, he's too fast and he hits my cheek, hard.

I gasp as it stings and turns to an ache, throbbing. He doesn't move and neither do I, I hold my ground.

I want to find Jonathan. I do.

I lean forward and reach up to stroke his cheek, watching his reaction carefully. He doesn't flinch but he's still tense and his eyes are watching me curiously.

I do something he really doesn't expect. I lean forward and my lips touch his. He responds in less than a second, his lips move with mine and I feel his hand slip under my shirt and onto my stomach.

He doesn't care what I'm thinking, he just wants me. And I just want him.

I push him back onto the sofa so that my legs straddle his waist. I pull away for a second and Sebastian is smiling, a little smirk on his face. I lean toward him again and my lips touch his neck, leaving a trail of soft kisses down it.

"My Clary..." He whispers and his fingers stroke my cheek. His skin is so soft despite the scars, he is pure perfection.

"My angel..." I respond. My fingers fumble with the buttons on his shirt, undoing them to expose his bare chest. I run my hand down it, feeling the scars that indent his skin. I kiss down his chest slowly, my hand slips under his jeans at the same time and I feel him tense then relax smirking. I kiss him again, removing my hand from his pants but suddenly his lips stop responding.

"Clary, why are you crying?"

He frowns, my face is center metres away from his and I can see the confusion in his eyes.

"What?"

But as he says it I realise that it's true. My cheeks sting from fresh tears. Sebastian reaches his hand up and with his thumb he delicately wipes a falling tear from my cheek.

"It's okay." He whispers. I feel strong arms encompass me and Sebastian holds me tightly to him. I rest my face to his chest and wrap my arms around his waist.

He could've had me if he wanted. But he stopped. There is some good in Sebastian, I think, and perhaps it's enough to save him.

"Sleep Clar. You can have my seraph blade another day." I look up at him and he's grinning, such a big childish grin that I can't help but smile back a little.

He plants a kiss on my forehead then gets up from under me, lieing me carefully back on the sofa and placing a cushion under my head.

He pulls on his shirt again and with a brief glance at me, he walks out of the room.