Desperation

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Loneliness is like a prison and I hate confined spaces. I think that's why I forgive very easily. I'd rather suffer with him than without him. That's what I told myself every time I found out he was cheating.

Allen Griffin. To the world, he is one of the top ten billionaires in the country, one of the sexiest bachelors named by gossip and entertainment media, and the owner of two biggest companies one in finance and the other in fast food industries. To me, he is the man that owns my heart. The man that I have been dating in the shadows for two years. He is nothing but a 6ft, grey-eyed man with an amazing body that pleasures me every night and holds me until I fall asleep. He is my prince charming.

He told me that our relationship is not for the public to see. That I'm his safe space, I believed him for a year.

It started with the supermodel plus ones that I would see him walk on the red carpet with. When I tried to ask him why change from the usual which was him being mysterious and not having a comment when he was asked about his dating life, he told me he was tired of the questions and he wanted to mislead the media. 

It worked and I believed him until I found him having sex with his secretary in his office, on his birthday. There was champagne and cake on the coffee table, so I guess I interfered in a celebration. I felt so stupid and I thought I was ready to give up on us but then, he apologised and told me that she came on to him. He even fired her and hired a guy for a secretary as a show of good faith. He promised me that, she was not his type and that he loved me and my unique body. Size 18, light brown skin colour and curly hair. I believed him but little did I know it was just the beginning of our routine.

○○○○Few Months Later○○○○

"Hi babe... you look amazing in tha-", he stopped when he saw the pictures I received on my phone from one of the girls he went out with the previous night. He claimed to be at an office event the night before. She was riding his cock in what looked like a nightclub. I don't even know how she got my number all I know is, I can tell the difference between a photoshopped picture and a real one and based on what I saw in them, they were real.

"Babe, I can explain", he said using the same sentence as before. "Allen, we're done", I replied before he could have time to justify himself and possibly come up with another excuse that would make me forgive him for the nth time. I went to our bedroom and packed my bags. I could hear him talk but refused to listen to him. I had enough.

I walked into my apartment locking the door behind me. I thanked the heavens that I didn't sell it when he convinced me to. I took out a bottle of whiskey and started drinking while crying and hoping that it would make things better.

I have been drinking for god knows how long. There was a knock on the door, that brought me back to a blurry reality. "Go away!", I shouted knowing that it was Allen. "It's Janet and Lisa. Please open the door Vicky", when I heard Janet's voice I started crying again. This would be the second time that they've come to my rescue. And the second time they will tell me to walk away but deep down in my heart, I knew that would never happen. Allen was the love of my life and even though it was wrong, I knew that there was no way I was going to live without him. Impossible. I was not ready for a life without him. "Please just leave me alone", I begged and I heard the footsteps fading from my door before passing out.



I felt my body being lifted from the sofa and headed somewhere but I didn't bother waking up. I was shaken softly and when I opened my eyes, I met the grey ones that I came to love desperately. He had guilt written all over him. 

"I know saying sorry won't make you feel better but Vicky, I love you and am sorry that I got drunk and did what I did. I would never do anything like that intentionally. I swear to you. Am so sorry babe and I will spend the rest of my life making it up to you", he said with tears in his eyes as he pulled me in a hug. I cried for what felt like a millionth time, on his shoulder.


One thing that Allen never compromised was his job. But he spent the whole month working from home just to take care of me. He called Lisa who was my assistant manager and told her I needed time off. She agreed immediately.

Running a supermarket was tough in the beginning but all changed when I employed Lisa. Even though she was just a mere employee in the beginning, she ended up being my best friend in a blink of an eye. She is a blonde pale skin woman that had a smile for days and a size 6 body that would make you beg for more. She was faithful and knew her boundaries and for that, I was grateful for. Janet was my other bff and we had been friends since middle school. She had jet black hair and was size 0 simply a goddess. She wanted to become a model, and she still does but it hasn't happened for her yet so she is currently bartending at one of the prestige clubs in town.

Allen walked into our bedroom with a tray full of food. All my favourites including his shirtless body. He placed the food on the bed and looked at me with pleading eyes. "Good morning babe", he said with a weak smile. He was trying to see if I would be more communicative this time around. I get that it is easy for him to think that I would feel better just because he was working from home but he was wrong. I was hanging by a thread and I had no idea how to deal with it all. I didn't even know if I had more to give.

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