i want you hyunjin || hyunlix

gorgeous

- hyunjin -

holy shit.

he's the most beautiful boy i've ever seen.

i feel my eyes widen as i try to take him in.

     when i looked down from the I WANT YOU HYUNJIN sign, i had been expecting a female stay with long hair and a phone videotaping my reaction. instead, my eyes lock with his.

     i can't stop admiring him. his face is an unimaginable balance between fierce and soft. he has dark brown hair that is slightly longer than mine and a cute nose. his lips are pink and look so sof—

i hear my cue to start singing pass by. shit. i look away from the boy and quickly snap back into the song, recovering the best i can. i smile and send stays hearts as i sing, looking around at everyone but him.

finally, i finish my verse. i plan on standing and moving around the stage but instead, i allow my eyes to drift back to the boy. he's still watching me, but this time it's clear he hadn't been expecting my attention. his eyes widen for a second before he flashes me a wide smile. he glows with an irresistible positive energy. i smile back at him genuinely. then i force myself to stand and make my way to a different section.

     "3racha" starts up and minho, seungmin, jeongin, and i make our way backstage. we head quickly for the couches but our manager blocks our way.

     "woah woah, slow down guys. do you have anyone in mind for the 143 passes? i need you to describe them before you forget what they look like."

usually, i tell him to give mine to anyone with an outfit based on a look i've worn, but tonight i have someone in mind.

     "ah, there's a boy in row two. he's slightly on my right when i stand center stage. he's wearing a leather jacket. i want him." i watch as our manager writes my description down on his notepad.

     "someone finally caught your eye, huh?" seungmin jokes. jeongin giggles, trying to hide it by covering his mouth with a hand. i suspected this would happen. i bat seungmin away with one hand, making a face at him, and then head to the couch.

     collapsing into it, i relax and let my thoughts return to the boy in the audience. his sign says he "wants me". what does that mean exactly? does it mean what i think it means? i remind my brain that this boy is a complete stranger to me, but it doesn't seem to care. i want to know more about him. and i'm going to find out more after the show. i feel the corner of my mouth twitch upward thinking about it.

     then the manager informs minho and me that it's almost time to perform "taste". i get up immediately and stretch, feeling more anticipation than i usually do.

right before we step onto the stage, minho puts a hand on my shoulder, stopping me.

     "should we switch sides so you can be in front of the boy?"

my eyebrows furrow and i turn to look at him.

     "could we?"

     "oh so it IS like that." he smirks at me mischievously. i realize my mistake. i've just confirmed my interest in the boy. shit. i'll never hear the end of it. i try to brush it off.

     "just do the normal choreo," i say, rolling my eyes at him before heading onto the stage. as soon as we reach our positions the music starts up. the audience goes INSANE. i move through the complicated yet fluid choreography as i'm showered in the dark pink and blue stage lights.

     when the song gets to minho's lyric "babe, don't test me, oh, no" i make eye contact with the boy in the crowd, hoping he understands my implication. i hold his gaze for as long as i can before the choreography requires me to look up and away. once i do, i realize that i can still feel his eyes glued on me. a tingling sensation courses through my body. i put my everything into this performance.

     we finish all of the maxident songs and an array of our other popular songs, ending with "haven". the crowd roars. some stays are crying. everyone is clapping or waving their lightsticks, phones, or posters and the energy is so high that you can feel it in the air.

     i turn in a circle, trying to see and wave at every single stay. my heart feels full knowing that they came to see us perform tonight.

slowly, my eyes make their way back to the boy. i lower my gaze to his neck and feel satisfied once i confirm that he received his 143 pass. the pink 143 lanyard hangs around his neck with his black vip one.

i look back up to his face and smile at him. he appears to be blushing but i can't be sure because of the lighting. he's so gorgeous. i think about how sweaty and gross i must look right now and silently pray that he doesn't find it unattractive.

- felix -

      i sit on the uncomfortable bench outside the conference rooms and wait. next to me sits the other six stray kids fans who were chosen for tonight's 143 passes.

     at first, they were a little nervous around me (possibly because i'm the only guy), but they warmed up to me quickly when we started talking about stray kids and they realized i'm just a huge fan like them.

     "the members are probably showering and getting ready to meet us right now!" one girl whisper-squeals to our little group. the others nod excitedly.

     "do any of you know how long we will get to chat with them?" someone asks.

     "not sure...maybe ten minutes if we're lucky?" another girl answers.

     "i saw something that said ten minutes on twitter!" someone adds.

     oh god. ten minutes feels like way too much time but also so little at the same time. my heart races. i place two fingers on my neck to feel my pulse.

     the sound of a door opening comes from the end of the hallway and we all look up. one of stray kids' managers walks our way holding a pile of clipboards.

     "hello guests, the members will be with you shortly. please read through these and sign on the line at the bottom," he says, handing us each a clipboard and pen.

      we read through the sheet informing us that a.) any violence or hate towards the members is prohibited, b.) the only items allowed in the room are a gift and/or letter for the member, c.) our phones and cameras must remain outside, and d.) that we are not to repeat anything discussed during the 143 pass meet and greet.

     a part of me is disappointed that i won't be able to take a photo with hyunjin but i shut that part up by reminding myself that i'm about to meet him in person and actually have a conversation with him.

     i sign my name on the line and reach up to hand the manager back the clipboard. except, when i look up, hyunjin is the one standing before me. he accepts the clipboard with an amused smile, head tilted to the side. i watch as he reads my signature. then he meets my eyes again.

     "thank you... felix."

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