Jan 15, 2023
So I'm on Chapter 7 of Mailman? More Like Breeding Slave with my mom, but I've been wanting to get some feedback on my classifications of the characters, so I'm now going through those with my mom, and oh my ghouls, my mom's analyses are hilarious.
me: So Ashido Mina is an alpha.
mom: What, why?
me: Well, probably because of how Kiri viewed her. Why, what do you think she should be?
Mom: Something timid.
me: So you think she should be an omega??
mom: No...
me: So what do you think she should be then?
mom: anything but an alpha
me: So do you think she should be a beta then?
mom: What's that?
me: Basically a normal person.
mom: She's not normal.
me: So I currently have Todoroki as a human, but I've been thinking about making his mom an ice dragon-shifter, so that'd make Todo half dragon-shifter.
mom: Yes. Let me look at what that is. (sarcastic tone like "this horrible trait is totally Todo's mom") Oh, look, she's cut off to other living things!!
me: So Mineta--
mom: Ugh.
me: Yeah. So I have him as a sex demon-
mom: Yeah, that makes sense.
me: -but what about OBA status? An alpha?
mom: NO.
me: A beta then?
mom: No, he's not normal.
me: Then what should he be?
mom: Well, he's not attractive, so he can't be an omega.
me looking back at this: ... Mom, you can't just say "none of the above" for all of these things....
me: What about Aoyama? Alpha?
dad: No, he's frigging... a wimp.
Update: agreed.
-Ojiro-
me: What about tail guy? Human beta?
dad: ... Ohh, the Aussie.
me: Th--The Aussie??
dad: Yeah, like a kangaroo tail.
me: Ohh.
me looking back at this: I really find this hilarious. I mean, I thought it was a lion tail; Shinsou calls it a monkey tail; and my dad thinks it's a kangaroo. ... I mean, I guess it doesn't have to be anything specific, but... I find it funny.
me: What about Present Mic?
dad: He's kind of an egomaniac.
me: (laughs) So a pride demon then?
dad: Maybe.
My dad wants everyone to be earth-type, geez-- Including Moonfish
me: Okay, what about Mr. Compress?
dad: Loser.
me: ... Species, dad.
dad: Loser man.
me: ...
dad: Okay, species... barely human.
me: ... What is so bad about Mr. Compress that he is one of two LoV villains that you reply with "loser."
me: Okay, what about Magne?
dad: Didn't she die?
me: Yes.
dad: So isn't it a moot point?
me: No.
dad: My classification is dead.
me: Okay, how about Mimic? He's the little midget that goes "AGGHHHHH!!" He goes into objects, and when he was in the wall or whatever, he got big, and he was blonde-
mom: Oh, yeah, I love that guy!! The one who peeks into walls??
me: (thinking about how we'd see Mimic's eye in the wall) Yeah. You like him?
mom: Yeah, he's funny.
me (inwardly): ??? He's a villain..
me: Okay, lemme check if we're talking about the same guy. (looks Mimic up on Google)
mom: Yeah, the blonde guy who peeks into curtains and stuff-
me (inwardly): Peeper?? Pervert?? What???
me: Okay, this guy?? (shows her some photos of Mimic)
mom: Oh, uh, no, I don't know that guy.
me: Who are you talking about then?? Kaminari???
mom: He's really bubbly.
me: (processes the quirk we're describing) OHH, you mean MIRIO--!!! (shows her a pic of Mirio) You're talking about this guy, right?
mom: Yeah, him!!
me: Okay, how about Eri?
mom: I don't know who that is.
me: The little girl.
mom: Wait, the bad girl??
me: Wha, the bad girl?? Who are you talking about??
mom: The one with Shigaraki.
me: OHH, you're talking about Toga-- No, no, Eri's younger than that. (shows her a pic)
mom: Oh, yeah, I like her!!
me: Okay, so what should she be?
mom: Okay, omega because she's attractive and sweet. Not human because I want her to be special.
me: What about Re-Destro?
mom: Who's that?
dad: The guy who got his legs ripped off. Shigaraki got ahold of his legs.
me: Yeah.
mom: ?? Is he a good guy?
me: No.
mom: Well, then, why would he be fighting Shigaraki??
me and dad: (tries to explain)
dad: They were in different villain groups.
mom: I don't get it.
me: Mom, there was a whole arc about the two villain groups fighting. Do you not remember My Villain Academia??
mom: No, I remember that. I liked My Villain Academia.
me: (shows her a pic) It's this guy.
mom: Oh, yeah, I know him.
me: Okay, so what should he be?
mom: Alpha. Or omega.
me: Wait, omega??
mom: Yeah, because he gets stressed out.
me: ... Mom, everyone gets stressed out; he just turns that into power.
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