Deserve You, Not *** (Camren)

Chapter 25: It's Time

Narrator's s POV

Although Lauren was still hurt and upset about what happened, she missed Camila. Although Lauren did not know how she wanted their relationship now, she wanted to see Camila's face. She wanted to cheer herself a little bit during the joyful season. Lauren sent a brief email to Camila, telling Camila that she would like to have FaceTime with her the day before Christmas. It would be an awkward video call, but she had to do it. She also did not want to leave everything unsettled for too long.

Lauren did know what to do with their relationship. She also did not want to break up or end things with Camila through calls or messages unless Camila insisted. Lauren did not think Camila would want that, too, to break up with her. If they or Lauren wanted to end their relationship, she would like to do it in person, when they met again. It was when she finished her project and returned to the country. For this moment, she just wanted to keep it as it was and see how things went. She also considered the other option, which was to take a longer break.

Lauren was going to talk about it with Camila.

Lauren: Hi! (Lauren greeted Camila as they were connected through FaceTime)

Camila: Hi! (Camila was too lost to respond more. She just looked at Lauren)

Lauren: How are you? (Lauren's heart ached when she saw Camila, who looked sallow and depressed. She could see the bigger dark circles under Camila's eyes.)

Camila: I'm Good. (Camila said murmuring. She was not good. They both knew)

Silence in between. They took a turn looking at each other on screen. They both missed each other, but none of them could speak their feelings.

Lauren: Are you at your parents' house? (Lauren broke the silence)

Camila: Yes.

Lauren: Please wish your mother a happy birthday from me.

Camila: Okay. I will. Thank you!

Other silence followed

Camila: Lauren... (Camila broke the second silence)

Lauren: Yeah?

Camila: I love you.

Lauren: ... (Lauren said nothing in return)

Camila: (Camila continued) I will always love you.

Lauren:... (Lauren frowned)

Camila: but I don't deserve you...

Lauren: Camila... (Lauren rubbed her forehead. Camila sounded like she wanted to quit their relationship. Lauren was not ready even though she did not expect it to last long.)

Camila: I think it's time...

Lauren: ... (Lauren could feel her tears building up)

Camila: for you to find someone who can love you better... who deserves you.

Lauren: ... (Lauren took a deep breath. If Lauren did not know Camila well, she would have thought Camila wanted to break up with her. Lauren knew Camila did not want that. Camila just felt guilty and thought she did not deserve to be Lauren's girlfriend after what she did. Lauren knew but she slowly asked anyway) Do you really want to end our relationship?