WARNING; this chapter contains: mentions of anxiety
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AFTER JUBILEE
wilhelm x simon
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THIRD PERSON'S POV:
Thoughts were running trough his mind without any break as he finished his speech. The speech he silently re-wrote during he was giving it. What has he done? He began to realize that he just came out to the whole country without the monarchy's - his mother's - premission. His parents will disown him for sure. Without a doubt; they'll just kick him out. Where will he go? He had no place to stay at. Maybe Simon would let him stay a few nights, after what he did for them. Oh God - he didn't even ask Simon if he was okay with... This. He won't be angry... Will he?
Wille could feel the anxiety rising inside his chest. Each breath was harder to take as his own words echoed in his head. He felt himself gasping for air and then suddenly, he heard an another voice besides his. This voice was much more quiet, like it came from under water - but still, he understood it perfectly. Maybe because that's what he was focusing on: "I love you," he was alone in the room, he knew that; but it still felt real - as if Simon was right next to him, whispering those three words that Wille had to wait for so long to hear, in his ear.
Did he mean it? When he said it, before the jubilee - did he actually mean it? Simon loved him? The way he loved Simon? It was unbelievable. He has been dreaming that moment to happen since... Well, since whatever that was before Christmas break - and now, that it finally happened... He just couldn't believe it. He closed his eyes, replaying the moments again and again. He didn't even notice, but his breathing became steady and his chest was no longer burning with pain. He was okay. Everything was okay. It wasn't perfect - no, perfect would mean Simon - but it was okay... And then, he heard a knock on the door.
He didn't know how much time he spent in there, he had absolutely no idea if anyone noticed him coming in there - but now, someone was waiting, and he had to get himself together. Maybe it wasn't the best idea to choose the bathroom as a hiding spot but he didn't have any other idea, and this was the closest option. He took a deep breath before he loosened his grip on the edge of the sink. He glanced at the mirror; he recognized the boy staring back at him way too well. His eyes were red, his cheeks were puffy in the result of crying, his hair was messy, his lips were swollen - he didn't look like a Crown Prince. And maybe, he wasn't. Erik would never let himself fall apart like this. But he wasn't Erik - he'll never be good enough.
He sighed, and opened the door. Before he could begin to apologise, arms wrapped around his shoulders and a head was pressed to his chest. He would recognize this scent anywhere; Simon. Simon was the person hugging him! But it only last for a second; he pulled away almost immediately.
"Sorry, it was probably a bad idea..." The shorter boy muttered, not really having any idea how to start the converstation they had to have.
"Come back here," Wille breathed and brought Simon back into an another hug. He didn't care who saw them; he didn't care who recorded the moment, or took pictures that would end up on the internet; he didn't care that his mother will literally kill him for the statement he gave. Right now, Simon was the only one who mattered. And let's be real; they both needed that hug more than anything.
"Should we get out of here?" He whispered into his ear, and Wille could feel himself nod. The interviewers can't go where their dorms at - for legal reasons - so he grabbed Simon's hand, and took him there. People will soon notice that they left and figure out where went... The information will probably get to his mother but God saw his soul; he wasn't bothered. Not now, and not anymore, that he came out and the world knew the truth. For the first time in a while, he was in total peace.
