Filming buddies

The couples game

1426 words

Jake started off saying "Good morning world, you are watching the couples game, I'm Hugh Janus". I walked in and said "And I'm Anna Borshin". Jake looked at the camera and said "And today we are interviewing two couples". I looked at the camera and said "So today we are going to find out who is the better couple".

Jake looked at the camera and said "Okay let's get to know these couples". Then I said "Our first contestant is Sam Goldencock". Sam looked at the camera and said "I might come off as shy but once you get to know me I'm really cool". Then Jake said "And here comes Sam's partner Colby Cockenballs".

Colby looked at the camera and said "Sup baby girl don't let me steal your heart". I looked at the camera and said "Next contestant is Aaron". Aaron looked at the camera and said "Sup fuckers what's good". Then Jake said "Our last contestant is Corey Story". Corey looked at the camera and said "Everyone wants to know my story". 

Then I said "So we are going to be asking our contestants a series of questions that will get better the more we ask". Jake looked at the camera and said "The first question is what was your favourite date". Corey went first and said "Our favourite date was when picked me up from the beach and when I got in the car we had ranch when I lifted his legs up".

I looked at Aaron and said "What was your favourite date". Aaron said "April 25th because it's not too hot and not too cold". Jake looked at us and said "Wow that was some very good stories but let's see if the other couple have better". Sam said "Well this one time we went to Florida beach and we took a long walk then he lead me up to a hotel room spread out some petals that was a magical night".

Then Colby said "We ended up doing anal a lot it was uhm painful for her my dick is big but it was cool". I looked at the camera and said "Okay well now we know that let's find out the bad habits they have". Corey looked at us and said "He is always putting his balls in really weird places like times I'll be chilling and his balls will be on some part of my body".

Then Aaron said "Sometimes he will shit on my face". Then Jake said "What about you two". Sam said "Well for some reason he always comes home with a new STD almost every single week he must be around a lot of people sneezing". Then Colby said "This bitch complains all the time and thinks I give her STDs, every time we slam our cheeks together he takes more of the pickle than I do and it ain't fair". 

I looked at the camera and said "Well these questions tell us a awful lot about their partners so if your partner went to jail what would it be for and what would you do to bail them out". Corey started and said "Aaron would go for one reason and that would be for stealing my heart so I would say wassup to the guard and I'll sneak him out".

Then Aaron said "One time he killed a guy with his surf board". Jake looked at Aaron and said "How did you get him out". Aaron looked at us and said "He didn't go to jail". I looked at them and said "Oh okay then Sam your turn". Sam said "In three years he has been to jail six times he keeps having sex and killing these co-workers to get him out I take a shovel and start digging".

Then Colby said "Honestly I don't see any reason for her to go to jail I mean look how precious but she always drops the shrop at home and it's like she's in jail". Jake looked and said "I think we can all agree that we can get a little sleep at times". I looked at them and said "So what we want to know is have you touched your partner in bed".

I sighed and looked at Jake while saying "Is that really what you wanted me to say". Jake looked at me and said "Y/n it says tuck you daft bitch". I looked at him and said "Oh okay that makes more sense". Corey started and said "My favourite way is to use my hands and I'll say you know your a good boy right". 

Aaron said "I firstly grab a blanket tuck him in and say YOU KNOW WHO LOVES YOU IT'S ME I LOVE YOU DON'T LET THE BEDBUGS BITE OR I'LL FUCK EM UP". Jake looked at Sam and said "How do you tuck your partner into bed". Sam looked at Jake and said "We usually tuck when we wake up every morning, midday".

Then Colby said "So first I put duct tape over his mouth so he shuts the fuck up and then I take my hand put it in a touch spread apart his hairy ass cheeks I punch down his dark alley of doom and I lift him into the bed". Sam looked at us and said "I love when he does that". I looked at Jake laughing and said "I actually can't cope".

I took a deep breath and said "Now we are going to find out how well you know your partner". Jake looked at me and said "This is going to be good so the question is what is your partners favourite place to eat". Corey looked up and said "His favourite thing to eat is nachos and beans". 

Colby looked at Aaron and said "Is that why it smells like fucking farts in here". Then Aaron said "Anyways my partners favourite food is poosta". I looked at Corey and said "Is this true". Corey looked at me and said "Yeah but I like buffalo wild wings more". Jake looked at him and said "So he looses you guys have one point".

I looked at Sam and Colby and said "Okay how about you two". Corey looked at me and said "Wait who is the guy in red again". I looked at Corey and said "That's Sam". Corey looked at Sam and said "Hey Sam I have pickles on my shoulder and I call it pickle dick". Aaron looked between the two and said "Guys stop fighting".

Colby looked at Aaron and said "Shut the fuck up". Jake looked at me and said "Oh for gods sake". Corey looked at Colby and said "Don't tell him to fucking shut up". Colby looked at Corey and said "You better sit the fuck down". I turned to Sam and said "Anyways what is your partners favourite thing to eat".

Sam looked at me and said "Well this fat ass always-". Colby looked at Sam and said "What the fuck did you just call me". Jake looked at me and said "Here we go again". Sam looked at us and said "Anyways he liked taco bell but because he wanted to go on a diet so now I think it is something like avocados". 

I looked at Colby and said "Is that your favourite food". Colby put a smirk on and said "Yeah". Jake looked at Colby and said "Anyways what is your partners favourite food". Colby looked at Jake and said "Uh I don't know McDonalds". Sam looked at Colby and said "I can't believe you don't know this". 

I looked at Sam and said "What is your favourite food then". Sam looked at us and said "Well normally I would go with him to buffalo wild wings". Corey looked at Sam and said "Yeah we fucking it up over there". Colby looked at Sam and said "Why the fuck you going with him, hey buddy get the fuck over here".

Jake looked at me and said "Oh for fucks sake". Colby looked at Corey and said "You have been fucking with my girl". Corey looked at Colby and said "That's a man". Colby looked at him and said "So you've been fucking with my boy". I got in the middle and said "OKAY SHUT THE FUCK UP BEFORE I MAKE YOU" making them all sit down.

Jake looked at the camera and said "Okay so now we have learnt she is a badass we give up". I looked at the camera and said "So we hope you enjoyed and we will hopefully see you again goodbye dudes".