Don't Change Me

Chapter 2- Regret

‘Making a big decision can change your entire life, it can also be extremely scary, but do you know what’s even scarier? ...Regret.’ 

🐺🐺🐺

People will stare at you for many reasons. 

‘ You are beautiful’

‘ you are ugly’

‘ You are interesting’ 

‘ You are weird’ and the list goes on and on.

Sometimes, if not most, it’s your duty to figure out which one it is but Louis feels a hundred percent embarrassed by the current situation he is in and couldn’t give no fucks as to what everyone is thinking. What he doesn’t like is the pity he is witnessing all around him. He does something he hasn’t had to do much in his life..........he runs. 

“ Don’t you even think about it, H.” 

Harry is stopped by Zayn’s arm as he attempts to move forward in hopes of chasing after him. 

“ Let me go.” 

Ripping his arm away, Harry frowns at being held back. 

Zayn quietly leans closer, trying to shield their conversation from the many scared and confused people who are still currently surrounding them. 

“Give him some space. I have no idea what game you just played, but I’m guessing the last person Louis wants to see right now is you.” 

Harry knows he is right and eventually gives a slight nod, acknowledging that he will behave. Many families are beginning to return to their homes, but Harry doesn’t miss the way he is being scrutinised by people passing him by. The whispers, the side eye, children staring at him like he is some sort of monster. His heart rate begins to incline as the onset of what he has done becomes full circle. 

He hates himself. 

Who needs enemies when you have yourself to hate on and torture. 

Hate, everyone knows the word and says the word with ease, but do you really understand it? Not really...... until you hate yourself, that is.

That.... is where the real power of self hatred, worth, and regret really lies. 

He covers his mouth with the palm of his hand as he begins to hyperventilate. 

“ Jesus Zayn, what have I done?” 

“ Look at me. Take a deep breath. Let’s head back to your office and then – “ 

“ WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU!” 

Zayn was interrupted by a very vocal sounding Sophie. You only had to take one look at her to identify her fury.

“ I ..... “ 

Harry has no words because what could he possibly say? Yeah, sorry about that, I’m in love with my best friend and wanted him for myself... no, he couldn’t do that. 

“ I hate you, I always have, but this time you have gone too far. I love Louis, I wanted to mate him, but you took that away from me! “