Harry Potter. Hermione X Male Reader Story

Complex Emotions and Love Potions

Hermione's POV

The week after my argument with (Y/N) was rather difficult to handle. The day after it happened, I felt like an idiot, like this whole situation was my fault for feeling the way I did about Ron.

I tried to push the thought out of my head, but I couldn't do so without crying. This was noticed by the others of course and soon rumours were circulating the school of our explosive break up. It wasn't untrue, but not the whole truth either.

Nobody saw (Y/N) that day, according to Harry he was sick, but I knew better. This made me feel worse, guilt welling up in my chest.

This of course inspired a few incidents, like (Y/N) being approached by some Hufflepuff fourth years on the way to Charms a few days later, much to Ron's amusement, not that I payed attention to it.

On top of that, Cormac McLaggen doubled his efforts to talk to me any chance he got. Apparently emboldened by my supposed break up with (Y/N), so much so that he asked me to attend Slughorn's Christmas Party with him.

The only person who I explained the truth to was Ginny, who was quick to offer her support with the situation. Honestly a part of me went to her to get an outside opinion to reassure myself that I had done the right thing.

She said that she didn't know and admitted her and Dean had been fighting recently, but reassured me that If I thought this was for the best then it couldn't hurt and if we truly loved each other it would be nothing in the long run and we'd jut have to see how it goes.

Despite her support, I couldn't help but think about what would have happened if I had just kept my feelings to myself. Was our break for better or worse? I honestly wasn't sure.

I had so many complex emotions about the subject it was hard to even deal with them all. I was upset that everything had happened the way it did, angry at myself that it even came to this and angry at him that he wouldn't trust me around Ron.

All of this was on top of the frustration, embarrassment, resentment, grief and every other emotion I couldn't help but feel when I thought of the whole situation

I didn't regret it though. It was the right choice, I was sure of it. It gave us time to breathe, to think. I needed time to process my feelings for Ron, he needed time to relax, so neither of us would have to worry about something like this again.

At least, that's how I justified it. After everything we said there was a tension on our relationship that needed time to heal. At the end of the day, we were both right, admittedly I tend to get jealous very easily, but he always overreacts when something happens.

But I'm sure this was the right thing to do. We needed time apart, otherwise we would just fight again and I don't know if we could handle this happening again. I can't believe I thought that Ron kissing Lavender was a heartbreak, it was like comparing a lit candle to Feindfyre.

Watching Ron and Lavender made it worse, it was like they were taunting me, showing me what life should have been like. Being in a room with the two of them was almost unbearable, I tried to avoid them to the best of my ability.

They must have been grating on (Y/N) too, a suspicion confirmed when Ron came into the common room complaining because of a significant bruise on the bridge of his nose and Lavender treated it like he was attacked by a squad of Death Eaters.

The only comfort I had for this whole scenario was the thought that this wouldn't be forever, that when we were both ready, everything would be set right again. He knew I loved him, and I knew he loved me, we would get through this. I was certain of it.

For the first week, we both avoided one another, any time I saw him felt strange, almost wrong to just ignore him. But I honestly just couldn't face him, partly because I was mad at him, partly because every bit of me wanted to go ever there and kiss him and forget all about this.