conflicting feelings

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(Picture is the recording studio)


I drive out to the university of brighton where my brother used to go and I head to his place he, Dylan and their friend Blake shared. "Hey Alex" Blake says when I knock on the door and I come inside "I'm sorry about Aaron" he says and I nod "Dylan Alex's here" he shouts and Dylan come through "oh hey" "hi" I say "come on I'll give you a hand with Aaron's stuff. About half an hour later we've packed up all his stuff and put it in my car. I sit on the couch with Blake and Dylan just talking when Dylan says "oh by the way happy birthday, I know it's late but still" "thanks" I say. I turned twenty last week I didn't do anything because Aaron was still in hospital. "Wait here" says Blake and he gets up a few seconds later he comes out with an envelope and hands it to me, I look at him confused "Aaron told me to keep it safe when you guys came back to the UK he told me to give it to you on your birthday if he wasn't there." I take the envelope from him "Thanks..I guess I should be going" I say and I get up "bye Alex" Blake and Dylan say and I leave. I open the envelope in my car and inside it has a key and a piece of paper with an address written and direction on how to get there and a birthday card with the words "Happy birthday sis I worked so hard on this for you but you deserve it, I love you -Aaron xx." inside. I look at the address and drive there.


When I arrive it's this medium sized house on it's own,just outside of the main part of Brighton. I take the key and unlock the door when I turn the lights on I look around amazed, it's a recording studio. I walk around with a smile on my face there's a load guitars hung on the walls and on guitar stand around the room. Just looking around I can tell there's an acoustic, an electric, a bass and even a twelve string guitar. There's a piano in the corner and a drum kit. I open one off the doors and find it's a recording room and a sound booth the other side. I open a few off the drawers and find a selection of different microphones and spit guards. I can't believe he did all this, all this for me. Then I start to feel an empty feeling in my stomach, how can I go from feeling so happy to feeling like shit in a matter of seconds. I decide to express my emotions the only way I know how, singing. I record myself playing piano first then I got to the soundbooth and record myself singing.

Afterwards I go home and I check my phone and start talking to Ash on snapchat he's gone to Ireland and I won't see him for another few weeks. He sends me a pic of him drinking starbucks and says "haha you can't have any" and I smirk and look over at Lola who is sleeping in my bed next to me and send him a picture and say "haha you've been replaced." he responds with a sad I smile and ask him how the tour is going and I get a snapchat of him and mikey saying "THE FUCKING LIGHTS WENT OUT" as a response. I burst out laughing and charlie (who is at my house) comes in the room "whatcha doing?" she says "snapchatting Ash" I say "come here" I say and we take a selfie Charlie crosses her eyes and I stick out my tongue I add "Miss you dorks!" and send it to Ash, He sends us this selfie and says "we miss you guys to you nuggets"

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