As It Was *Complete*

5. Don't You Want Me?

Astra had not spoken for a good few minutes. She wasn't even sure what to say. In front of her, once again, Snape and Sirius were arguing. This time about her. "Who just springs it on a person like that?!"

"You said to get to the point!"

"Yes, you idiot but you could have done it a little more.... I don't know, affectionate. I know that would be bloody hard for you, but the poor girl is now traumatised. Imagine finding out that Severus Snape is her father. I could think of nothing worse." Sirius smirked.

"You wouldn't know, would you. You have spent your best years behind bars if I remember correctly."

"Alright enough!" Remus said again, running his hand through his hair. "We are supposed to be explaining this whole thing to Astra. Helping her understand. Not shouting at each other like school children."

"I am confused," Astra said finally once she had come to her senses. "You are my father?" She said, looking at Snape. He nodded. "But you were not in a relationship with my mother at the time?" He shook his head. "What happened?"

Snape looked down at his teacup. "Your mother and I...well, we were friends the entire way through school. It was just her and me." Sirius scoffed, but Snape ignored him. "I met her when I was just a boy. Her and her sister. I adored her. She was my everything. And I honestly believed we would be together forever." Again Sirius scoffed, and Remus smacked his arm.

"But I was wrong," Snape said sadly. This got Sirius' attention. "I began to become obsessed with the Dark Arts. I took a bad path, and I spiralled out of control. She began to pull away from me. I was losing her, but I thought that what I was doing was worth it. I was so wrong. She met another boy. One who, like me, seemed to worship her, and she was happy."

Both Sirius and Remus were quiet, never having heard this version of events before.

"I thought he was an idiot but I could see that he loved her. I hated it, but at the same time, I just wanted her to be happy. Happy and safe. She would still plead with me to turn away from my dark arts, but it was like an addiction. I couldn't stop. She was better off with him. I know that now."

Astra looked at the sadness on his face. It must be hard to admit your love is better off with another man. "So how exactly did you end up with me?" Astra asked, confused.

"That's what I wanted to know," Sirius said, looking annoyed.

Snape sighed. "In our final year, I was tutoring your mother and her friend a bit. I was a dab hand at potions and was giving Teresa some pointers. It was nice, and it gave me a bit of balance. Your mother and I had got sort of close again, and she was confiding in me. She said that while she loved her boyfriend, he had a mean streak sometimes. Not to her, you understand, but she didn't like that he... was a..."

"Bully?" Remus offered.

"How could you say that, Moony?" Sirius gasped.

"Because he was. You know he was. He and you both used to torment Severus and others. And I was just as bad because I knew it was happening and didn't do anything to stop it." Remus shrugged.

"Anyway, they had a huge fight one night, and I think she told him she was done with him. She came to my dorm and spent the weekend with me." Snape said. Sirius made a face. "Just talking. I slept on the floor and she took the bed."

"You don't get pregnant by sleeping on the floor," Sirius frowned.

"Well, the following week, he spread rumours that she and I had sex. Passed it around the whole school and called her a slut for it."

"I remember that," Remus said sadly. "She cried for three days straight. I stayed with her in the common room. I couldn't leave her...until the night of the full moon."