As It Was *Complete*

59. Delusional Sophie

"It's a bit crazy we know," Draco said. "We know that there are a million reasons why we should be scared about this. But the truth of the matter is that we love this baby already. More than we thought possible. We want to give this baby the childhood it deserves. The one we never got to experience - having parents who love and cherish you and actually want you in their lives."

Snape bit his lip.

"Look, we want your blessing but do not need it. I am keeping this baby and I am going to be the best mother there has ever been," she nodded for emphasis.

"Well," Snape said covering his mouth with is hand. "I mean, I was a little shocked by your announcement. I mean, you have only been together a short while and, while I know that you are soulmates but you are young and this pregnancy changes a lot," he was pinching the bridge of his nose and pacing the room.

"Have you thought about what you are going to do when the baby arrives?" Snape asked looking up at the couple. "Will you live together? Will you live in your cottage or somewhere more up to the Malfoy standards -"

"Hey!" Astra pouted.

"Well the Malfoy's are used to a certain standard. Will Draco be willing to downsize for you?" He looked to Draco now.

"Anywhere with Astra and our baby is my home. I would live in a shoebox with them and be happy." Draco said puffing out his chest.

"And what about your careers? Astra you wanted to be a writer, how are you going to work with a baby? And Draco you planned to take over Malfoy Industries - how will you do that with the a newborn? And when is your due date?"

"In June," Astra said quietly.

"OK but what if you go early? It is fairly common. Your water could break right in the middle of your exams?"

"We don't know that will happen. I don't have all the answers right now. There are things we will have to discuss and plans we will have to make. We may not have it all figured out but does anyone when they are given a surprise like this?"

Snape nodded. "That is true I suppose."

"We don't have to figure it all out right now. We are being responsible and telling our parents and the Headmistress. Those who need to know. Everyone else we will wait for a few weeks until the pregnancy is further along."

"That is....a smart decision." Snape said and hung his head. "I am sorry. I am happy for you both. I can see that you are a good couple and I know that you love each other. But I am a parent and it is my job to worry and stress and I feel like I have years of making up to do for all the time that we lost."

Astra stepped forward and wrapped her arms around her father. "You don't have to make up for anything," she smiled. "I know you feel guilty but you did what you thought was right at the time to keep me safe. I feel like I can understand that now."

Snape actually smiled. A smile that he wasn't used to. A smile he did not even know he was capable of. This girl, his daughter came back into his life and turned it on it's head. He had become comfortable in his life. The sad, miserable git that he was. He kept to himself, showed no emotions and did a pretty damn good glare which he liked to share with his students. He never allowed himself to feel happiness. Never allowed himself to even try. If you didn't try, you didn't fail.

And he had already had so much sorrow in his life that he didn't want to add to it so it was better to keep people at arms length. Then when Albus died, his shield came down and he remembered. He remembered everything. His daughter, giving her up and the life he had. And he wanted it back.

He needed it back.

He knew she would be in Hogwarts and he found himself looking into the eyes of every girl in a specific year. Hoping to see a familiar pair looking back at him. But he never seemed to be able to find them. Maybe because it had been so long that he had forgotten.