Stories of Love In The Air

(SP) Love [2] (End)

Pai's pov:

I stared at the papers pasted on the wall infront of me blankly after the door closed behind Phayu.

Not love... Abuse...

Not normal...

It's not ok...

All those moments i started doubting her words came to mind.

I would question if this was really ok. If this was really the best for me.

But everytime, she managed to convince me that it was ok. That she was just wanting the best for me.

I got up from the bed and went to my desk, sitting on the chair before opening my laptop.
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I couldn't help the shaky sigh that escaped my lips after seeing the similar stories of so many people.

Of how it destroyed their self confidence and so many relationships with others.

How they felt so alone and isolated.

How they tried to deny it for years. Not wanting to believe that their own loved one would want something bad for them. That someone who said they loved them would hurt them like that.

Fresh tears formed in my eyes as i clutched my hair in tight fists.

Fuck...

How did i not understand sooner?

How have i been so stupid...

I let her control me all my life. Down to the last calorie.

Blindly trusting everything she said.

Such a fucking idiot!

I shot upfrom my vhair, swiping my arm over the desk, throwing everything to the floor with a loud crash.

Everyone must have been thinking about how fucking dumb i was. How i was such a naive idiot.

Blindly following his mother's every word without question.

"Aaaaahh!!" I threw the chair to the other side of the room as i felt anger boil in my gut.

How could i be so fucking naive?!

FUCKING IDIOT!!
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"-ai! PRAPAI!! STOP!!" I stiffened when i felt hands wrap around my arm and yank me back.

I slowly looked down at my arm, recognising the hands that were holding it.

I slowly looked at her through my tears that were actively streaming down my face.

"What's going on with you? Why are you destroying everything?" She asked worriedly.

What's going on with me?

I yanked my arm from her grasp and tooo a big step away from her.

I could feel a sharp pain coming up from under my foot and i knew i had stepped on something sharp.

But i didn't pay it any heed.

"Pai? What's going on?" She frowned.

"You lied to me... My whole life... You've been lying to me..." I muttered.

"What do you mean? Pai, i never lied to you." She stepped closer.

But i took more steps back, making her stop.

"You have. You said this is the best for me. You said it would make people not want to leave me. But all it's done is push people away. My friends from high-school and middle school distanced themselves because they were scared of how obsessed i was with it." I pointed at the meal plans on the wall.