White & Gray

chapter 5,5 - enough

Sam

"What happened?"

Two words came out of my mouth, towards her, about her, for the first time in 3 months.

After 3 months of trying to hold myself really hard, that was the time that I let it slip. It was the most awful time. Jason was yelling at her and Vince has just returned.

For the past 3 months, I have avoided everything about her. I stayed away from her. I left the room even after someone else mentioned her name. I did not let anybody in this house think or believe that I had something in my mind about her.

I did not even know all of these things happened. I saw Vince like this, a lot of times. I joined him as we beat the crap out of the people that crossed us. I knew that anger, I was familiar with it. Never thought I would see this side of Vince with me.

He was my brother. He should have known my heart. He should have guessed my intentions. I am mad at him. Normally, me being mad about it would be different. I believe he kind of knew it as his fists were on my face. I hold grudges. With every fist that ended up on my face, I hated him more and more. My face was numb but my heart hurt more.

Then, he left. My first thought was fucking Diana. Fucking her so hard that her screams fill this house and Vince can hear them from England.

Obviously, this was not the first time I imagined fucking her. She was part of my fantasies as she was the girl I grew up with, but it was the first time I vividly imagined it while we were both older.

But it was her. I couldn't do that to her. Although I might be willing to do that to her, which made Vince punch me, I couldn't. She can't be used as a weapon of revenge. She is more than that to us. To all of us.

I kept my distance because of this. I knew Jason would tell to Vince. We all have our issues, we all have a family bond, and we all can die and kill for one another. However, our loyalty to Vince is something else for all of us.

My capability to stop myself from talking to her was because of this fact. He deserves it. He could kill and die for each one of us. He took care of us as well as our families and he took us near him when we needed him.

His red line is Diana. When it comes to her, he could happily dance on our graves. We all know it, we all are okay with it.

I knew that whatever Jason told him can be seen as crossing his line. Because that line is too short and thin. "You can have no intention but to protect her," he says constantly.

Since the 3 of us grew up together and Vince was the oldest one, he never assumed something might be happening. He always looked at us as his little siblings. He could never see Diana as a grown-up from the day that he took her in with us.

On the contrary, from the day he took her in with us, I never saw her as a young sister. I saw a mature, sexy woman that lived through some difficult times just as we did. Because that was what she needed. A friend. I became that.

So, I deserved to know what the fuck happened. I could take those looks from Jason one more time so I didn't care. My response was cold as expected.

Vince was out and won't be coming back. No one would assume I could go to her room after Vince's return so this was my shot. At the same time, it is risky but who the fuck cares now?

My only concern was her not wanting to talk to me. She could do anything for Vince too."Come in." she said. The shock on her face was instant. She wasn't wrong, even I was surprised. I walked in and tried really hard to figure out where to sit. Thank god she told me to sit on the bed.

I could have done anything that she said at this point. The last thing I thought she would do was cry. I never assumed she was sad about this because she seemed so well put together or clearly she was just playing.

That's what kept me going as well. I knew that Vince's judgment was her judgment as well. So I thought she wanted to punch me too.

"Forgiving him was not fair to you." must be the best words that I heard in years. She was blaming Vince too. That's all I needed to hear. I did not care at all about her forgiveness. I knew she would, I knew she should. That was okay. I just needed her to be on my side in her heart.

I couldn't stop hugging her. After 3 months, I needed this all night. But my body reacted immediately. I could feel my dick getting hardened. I needed to let go. Both her and my grudges. I said, "It wasn't about something that happened 5 years ago."

Translation, my body reacts to you and I will soon deserve these punches.

I knew she wanted to hear more about the meaning. I thought of a few answers but every one of them would make her angry at me. There is no innocent way of saying "You being Vince's weak spot makes your scent irresistible to me."

"I missed you," she said. Now they are the best words I've ever heard. I came to my senses and managed to stand up. When I opened the door I saw Dylan, and my senses were gone.

"What are you doing here?" I couldn't contain my voice.

He has been here for days and he was in her room? Naive Diana thinks everybody just wants to be friends.

I took a deep breath and walked away smiling. I let it go because I knew Vince would do the killing for me. That poor guy won't even last a week.