Flower

15

Violet

Today is my 16th birthday... I never really cared for my birthday, it was always just a normal day for me.

When I was with my foster family my mom once tried and make me a cake.

With my help of course and we would put come candles on it and blow.

But at the end of the day he always came and beat mom up for using stuff we could use for actual food on a useless cake.

So when she mentioned making a cake for my other birthdays I would refuse and just ask for hugs.

Which she would gladly do. She would say sorry for not being able to get me a toy or pretty dresses like other girls my age.

But I was greatful. Being with her was better then sitting on a bed in an orphanage.

And my actual mom. When I was still at the orphanage I would be more curious then ever on my birthday.

I would think about the things she did on this very day.

I would sometimes even doubt if she remembered she had a daughter on this day.

Maybe she didn't.

Maybe she completely forgot about it.

It might just be a random day for her.

It is for me so why wouldn't it be for her.

I heard that some moms who put their kids up for adoption don't even touch them when their born.

Did mine touch me.

Did she hold me in her arms?

I heard that a child always remembers their mothers scent to.

I don't know if that's true though. Maybe it is.

Because when I was still at the orphanage sometimes babies would be dropped at the door.

And once a baby was dropped with their mothers clothing.

When they tried to take it away from her she would cry but would stop the moment we put it close to her.

I wish I had something like that but I don't. I have absolutely nothing.

Im currently sitting on the sofa and getting frustrated at my damn phone. It's been through alot and its megga old so it breaks down once in awhile which is annoying but it is all I have.

Sometimes when I take the battery out the back and put it back in it magically has more or less battery.

Which is worring I hope it doesn't explode next to me.

It finally turned on but it kept opening random apps.

Like for fucks sake.

I hit my phone on my hand making Lizzie come into the living room. "What are you doing? " she asked with a chuckle.

"This damn phone is losing it's damn mind again... " I said with frustration.

"I'd help but I don't know much about that. " she said looking down at me.

"Where did you get that phone? " she asked.

"At a second hand store. I choose the cheapest option and it's like very old. So it does this sometimes but more often now. I guess me falling with it in my pocket took a toll on it. " I said and sighed looking at the broken screen.

"What about we get a new one? " she asked with a smile.

I looked up at her. "Why? "

"What do you mean why? I mean it's ready to give out any moment. " she said looking at the phone in my hand.