12.
A month has passed since I made the decision to move back home. I've seen Amy once or twice but I haven't really gotten the chance to see any of the boys. I wasn't fussed on the idea either because seeing them would mean I would have to see Brad. I forgive him for what he did, I over reacted anyway. It's just, I don't know to see him simply because I know I'm not over him. And I don't want to see him with anyone else.
I haven't left the house in I don't know how long. I've been mostly planning and setting up my blog. I've wanted to become a beauty blogger since forever and having all this free time on my hands has really forced me to start one. It helps me stop thinking about him for a while too.
Several times I've picked up my phone and typed a message to him but not had the courage to actually hit send. What if he's still with Lauren? Knowing wouldn't help me but I can't help but wonder about it.
Instead of texting Brad, I ring Amy. It rings three times before she picks up.
"Chummy I miss you." Amy says, sighing into the phone. Chummy is a nickname we have for each other, don't ask. It just randomly came about one day.
"I miss you too." I say into the phone.
"How have you been anyway?" She says, sounding concerned.
"I'm fine, don't worry." I say, lying to myself a little.
"Grace, I know when you're not okay."
"I'm fine, how's everyone anyway?" I ask although I'm really just asking about Brad.
"Their good. Me and Con are just chilling, James is out with Tris somewhere and Brad is-" She says, before stopping herself.
"Aim, don't be stupid. I can hear what he's doing." I say, wanting to know even more.
"He's out with Lauren." She says, her voice quieter this time.
"Oh." I say, not being able to find anything else to say.
"You okay?" She asks.
"Yeah, why wouldn't I be? I don't give a shit anyway." I say, lying to myself again.
"Oh okay then. Oh Con wants to say hey." She says, the phone being passed to Connor.
"Hey, you alright?" He says.
"Yeah, I'm good. I feel like I haven't seen you guys in ages." I say, missing them even more.
"You will soon, don't worry." He says, before passing the phone back to Amy. What?
"Chummy, I have the best idea ever." She says, getting excited.
Oh God. I let out a silent laugh before listening to her explain her "amazing" idea.
Basically, for some reason Amy thought it would be a good idea to spy on Brad and Lauren and tell me all about it. I know it was his life and his choices but Amy wasn't keen on the whole Lauren fling, neither was the rest of the boys. I don't know why, she was a nice girl. It just so happens that me and him were speaking when they first starting "hanging out".
"Can we call it operation cheetah please, please." Amy says, looking over to Connor. We decided to Facetime each other instead just because it's easier for some reason.
I laugh at her, she's so stupid sometimes.
"Oh my god, I get it because cheetah!" Connor shouts before laughing loudly.
"What?" I say, feeling confused.
"Cheetah because cheater." She says, feeling proud of herself.
"But he didn't cheat on me, we weren't together really." I say, defending him a little.
"Well he kinda it, you know what I mean."
I wasn't hugely into the whole "operation cheetah" but I suppose it's better to laugh about it than be upset? After ending my call with Amy and Connor, I type up my first blog post and publish it. I'm kind of nervous for it to go up, I'm not experienced at all in that department. I just spend a lot of my time reading different blogs so that's all I can go from really. But I want my to be individual, I want it to have it's own style.
After I'm done editing and retouching bits here and there, I take a hot shower. I let the hot water slip over my skin whilst I wash my hair. I think I may look for a apartment in Cardiff somewhere. I can tell I'm getting on my parents nerves although they won't admit it. That's another reason why I moved to London, because I wanted my own space. I make a mental reminder to go and look at a few places.
Brad's P.O.V
It's been a month since we've come from touring with Austin Mahone. It was unreal, the crowds were amazing. It's also been a month since I haven't been able to stop thinking about her. I miss her, I do. That's really why I think I'm still with Lauren. I can't help it though, I guess I just don't want to be alone. I say goodbye to Lauren before going back to the apartment. I go straight into my room and fall into bed.
I strum on my guitar, not being able to get Grace out of my head. I've been trying to write a few songs for the upcoming album but I just can't seem do get anything done.
I strum again, managing to find a tune. I play the tune over and over before softly singing, "Cause I can't get you off my mind, I'm drifting day to day, I just lay awake, no I can't sleep."
I messily write the words down before singing some more. I sing louder, my voice starting to shake.
"In another world, oh I know, I know, I know that you would be my girl and nothing would tear us apart." I wouldn't mess it up and kiss another girl. I wouldn't hurt her like I did.
