Stalemate // The Queens Gambit //Benny Watts x OC

Two: Family values

The next day, Macy went back home to make up with Jamie and I got to read a bit before seeing my mother for lunch. I left my apartment at three and walked to a cozy little cafe where she said to meet. I saw her sitting at one of the patio tables and she waved me over excitedly. When I came over she stood and gave me a tight hug, kissing both my cheeks.

She had moved to paris with her boyfriend after I moved out and came to visit every four months, not including holidays. I dont know why she insisted on still living there. She had to buy tickets to fly here more than she bought groceries and she wasn't even with said boyfriend anymore, inevitably going back to her usual flow of men.

But it makes her happy and I don't have to deal with her mental breakdowns as much so I wasn't complaining.

"How are you my darling?? You look great, even better than last time I saw you." she said as we pulled out our menus. This was how she always greeted me.

"And you look wonderful, as always. I'm doing alright, how are you?" My usual reply

"Oh I am wonderful. I met the most fascinating man last week, his name is Leo." she said while grinning dreamily.

"That doesn't sound like a very Parisian name." I gave her a questioning look and she just got more excited

"It's not! He was born in Britain, then lived in the USSR for most of his life, and just recently moved to paris but is already fluent. He calls me mademoiselle." she smiled and adjusted her dark hair

"Wow, a traveled man, huh? Well he sounds great." then I add, "just be careful."

She rolls her eyes a little and takes my hand "I will hun, don't worry about me. I really think this guy is a keeper!"

I give her a small smile, genuinely happy for her but already seeing this play out. One of them gets bored, the other moves to a different continent. In my head I'm already writing in my little notebook where I keep track of all my mother's men.

Not to say my mother's a whore or anything, she doesn't do it on purpose, it's just that she's always had a problem with relationships. I think her longest one was with my father, Oliver Carlisle, which lasted two years.

They were married, then mother got pregnant and he stayed right by her side through it all but mostly out of obligation. After my first birthday, he left and now I rarely see him. He calls occasionally and we meet up at least once a year, but the most I ever see of him is in the paper. He's the co-owner of an incredibly successful Brazilian coffee company, Carlisle & Barbosa Coffee Co. He runs it with his friend, Gabriel Barbosa. Another very successful business man. I've met Gabriel a few times, he's nice, But I can't help feeling a little jealous that he gets to see my father more than I do.

Oh well. Family dinners are overrated anyway.

***

After lunch we go to a park down the road and continue our conversation. When we get there we sit on a little bench and watch as a couple plays fetch with their dog.

"So how's Macy?" Mother asks

"She's alright I think, she and Jamie had another fight last night.. about money I guess. They'll be fine though."

"Of course. I don't know how those two have stayed together all this time but it sure is inspiring."

I shrug a little and fumble with a loose thread on my skirt. "I guess. I don't know, it seems like they're always just pushing each other's buttons."

"It does seem that way, huh? Well I'm sure there's a lot more of the good moments than the bad ones. The bad ones are just more entertaining." she laughs a little and nudges me gently with her arm. "Speaking of which, I tell you all about my pursuers but you never tell me about yours." this causes me to snort a little out of surprise and amusement.

"Mother, if you think I have any pursuers I am going to have to disappoint you."

"I don't believe that's true. You've always been a little thick headed when it comes to matters of the heart, maybe you just haven't noticed."

"Are you calling me cold..?" I give her a look and she just laughs

"No sweetheart, I'm calling you clueless." to which I swat at her shoulder gently

"I'm not clueless I just don't really give a damn. I'm not worried about anything like that right now."

"Well you better start worrying! Soon I'll be growing old and weak Addy, I'd like to meet your male prospects while I'm still young and beautiful enough to steal them from you if I like them enough." she jokes and I roll my eyes.

We change the subject pretty quickly after that and I'm grateful. I really don't give a damn about "matters of the heart." I'd much rather go to a bar and play chess than got to a restaurant and flirt. It seems exhausting and honestly, pointless. Considering how I grew up, I'm not surprised I would think so. But am I wrong, really? I'll take other people's word for it.

***

After a few more hours with my mother, we part ways and plan to meet tomorrow at the same spot with Macy and her mother. Mrs Evans and my mother are also good friends, but never got as close as me and Macy since her mother always somewhat questioned my mother's ways with men. But who wouldn't by now?

I got back to my apartment a little past 7 and started to make dinner. Tonight it was spaghetti and meatballs since I was tired and didn't want to make something too extravagant. I got pretty into cooking when I was around 12 and had over 200 recipes memorized by 16. Needless to say I was an obsessive child.

After eating, I cleaned my apartment a little and climbed out my window to sit on the fire escape stairs and have a cigarette before bed. I dangled my feet over the ledge and made smoke rings as I watched the lights from traffic and thought.

What if my mother was right, even just a little? Maybe I am too thick headed, maybe I need to socialize more somewhere besides in front of a chess board. I am pretty content with my life how it is but the more I think about it, will that always be good enough? I'm not dying to get married and have kids or anything, definitely not anytime soon at least, and I don't think I really need a boyfriend. But maybe I am missing out on some things and experiences that could possibly make me happy, instead of only content.

I decided that tomorrow after lunch I was going to talk to Macy about going out somewhere. Just to see if I like this whole socializing and trying new things idea. Then if I hated it, I could just go right back to cooking and chess. And if I liked it, well.. god knows where I'll go from there.