Stalemate // The Queens Gambit //Benny Watts x OC

Eighteen: It Was A Dark And Stormy Night...

    I slowly opened my eyes to see darkness staring back at me, which made me feel confused and disoriented until I realized it was the middle of the night. I sat up in bed, rubbing my face and glancing around. The room was still and silent except for the quiet thunder outside, the clock reading 2 am. I groaned quietly. This is one reason I liked the alcohol, I was able to sleep through the night and sometimes into the next day.

I got out of bed and tiptoed to the kitchen. This was the ritual when I woke up in the night. Make a warm drink, read a book or play chess, then try to go back to bed. If that doesn't work, smoke a cigarette outside and that'll usually do the trick.

But on my way I noticed the couch was empty. I frowned and looked around. His coat and shoes were still by the door which meant he hadn't gone home, but he wasn't anywhere inside so I cracked the front door open and there he was, that godforsaken hat sitting lazily in front of his eyes, smoking over the balcony.

I debate just leaving him be but I probably wouldn't be able to sleep anyway, might as well just skip straight to the cigarette, even though it must have been below 40 degrees and was still raining. I step out and close the door as quietly as possible, sneaking up behind him.

"Boo" I say directly in his ear and he yelps, jumping away from me.

"Jesus you scared the shit out of me," he exclaims, a hand over his chest. I burst into laughter and he rolls his eyes, returning to his spot leaning on the railing. "What are you doing up?"

"Couldn't sleep."

"Everything alright?"

"Yeah, this happens sometimes, it's no big deal. What are you doing out here?"

"Couldn't sleep either."

"How come?"

"I don't know..The view is nice here though so I decided to come outside for a bit."

I nod and sit on the railing, dangling my legs over the edge. He was right, it is a nice view. The streets below are black and glossy with rain, the buildings a little further into town shining like Christmas lights, the blue black sky lit by the waxing moon. I closed my eyes and let my lungs fill with the cold and moisture in the air, shocking my senses.

"May I?" I gesture to the pack of cigarettes in his other hand and he holds them out to me. I grab one and light it, taking a drag. We sit there silently for a few minutes and just stare out at everything, the rain getting harder by the second.

"So are you ready for tomorrow?" Benny asks

"I think so. Probably as ready as i'll ever be."

"Well thats good, right?"

"I guess.. I don't know, I just feel like no child should have to bury their mother."

"You're right, they shouldn't. But I think almost every kid is gonna have to, eventually. It's just a part of life, albeit a fucked up one. But you're tough, you're gonna make it through this. And then the next problem will come up and you'll kick that one in the ass too."

He looks ahead as he talks and I stare at him the whole time. I cant help thinking—he looks beautiful. The way his eyes reflect the blurry city lights, how his hair falls into his face but he doesn't seem to notice, the hint of a smile tugging on the corner of his lips. Even just the way he talks, his voice, soft and low, his tone, sweet and reassuring. how he's being so kind but in such a casual way. Benny isn't just some arrogant chess prodigy, he's also a beautiful person.

Somewhere in my thoughts I forget to respond and Benny glances over at me curiously. I shake myself and pull my eyes away from him and back to the city. "Thank you.." I say, barely a whisper. He looks forward again too and nods, blowing smoke out his nose and fiddling with the pack of cigarettes. I've made it awkward.